Residence Life - - "Diversity Training"

orange · November 19, 2003, 17:38

What has become so positively draining on my life is my University's view of Diversity and Diversity Training. If you think my opinion is wrong, say so. If you think I'm right, please help me confirm that I'm not insane. I'm going to try to be as objective as possible when explaining what this is about.

Some background: I'm an RA at my University, and I'll likely become a Hall Director next year. It's my second year working in Residence Life. It's a more demanding job than I think many people realize it is, at least here. It's a lot more than just busting residents and being a friend to your residents.

So here goes. First and foremost, the only way that I think you should judge people is on their individual characteristics. If I don't like you and you happen to be black, it's not because you're black. It's because I think you're an *******. I don't feel that it's right to think "Well, this person is black, so I should give them a break". I feel that the end goal of any diversity movement is to have people treat others as individuals (You know, judgement based on the content of one's character) then the only way to reach that goal is to do that.

Not only is this view 'incorrect' to Residence Life, it is a cardinal sin. We have a special Hall Director whose job it is to work on Diversity issues at the University. Not that I think it matters, but she is white. We shall call her "JJ" because the mere sight of her name makes me want to rip the flesh from my body and scream blue murder.

At one such 'diversity training' session, a white student (RA) raised her hand and asked a question. She noted that two of her black residents were going to another RA (who was black) with their problems. She wondered why that was, and what she could do to make them feel more comftorable coming to her. JJ responded in a verbose manner, saying that as black people their experiences with white people were probably very negative, and that they were completely within their rights not to trust her as a white person. She then said that if they felt more comftorable going to a black RA with their problems, they should be able to. JJ then said that she should make a greater effort to be open to them, get to know them, and show concern for 'black issues' if she really wanted them to go to her, but even then they should not be expected to.

I didn't agree with that answer, but alright...as long as we're going both ways on this of course...

Another RA raises his hand. Also white. "Well does that also apply if a White person doesn't go to his Black RA?" JJ responds in two very loud, very disturbing sentences. "Absolutely not! That is Racism!"

When I say that I got up and left the room, I am not joking. It infuriated me so much that I could not sit there and listen to it any longer.

These examples occur at our campus wide Diversity training sessions. Now I have an example of what is going on at our individual staff meetings.

Again, a little background first. At a campus wide RA Diversity Training session, we had a guest speaker. He is fairly well known, perhaps you have heard of him. Le Mun Wa...he was on Opera before, and he does films. Two of the ones most well known are "The Color of Fear" and "Last chance for Eden" (or something like that).

He told us a story about how he was flying on a United plane, and because he dresses in traditional Chinese clothing and styles his hair in a traditional Chinese way (though he was born in America to legal immigrants) the pilot picked on him, and referred to him as a possible terrorist. Very sad, indeed. The kicker of it all - he did nothing about it! AND he still flies United! If that were me, I'd work to destroy the racism by hitting this guy where it hurts. You go as high as you can within the company making complaints about that person, and insert that you (as a frequent flier, which he is) will NEVER fly United again because of this incident.

Anyhow, he showed us one of the films, which involved a collection of people of different races (White, Native American, Hispanic, Black) sexual orientations (Heterosexual, Bisexual, Homosexual) and both genders.

What basically occurs in the film is that the white people begin to talk about how they don't feel that they are racists, and then are attacked by two or three of the others (minorities) for being racist, citing absolutely insane examples, and making them feel as if they are the reason racism still exists though they have clearly done NOTHING wrong, and certainly not at the meeting.

Afterwards, different people stood up and talked about how they were affected by racism at the hands of white people. Some of the stories were very sad, of course. But a few of them filled me with disgust for that individual. A Complex Coordinator who is Puerto Rican (very dark, with Native South American features...almost looks like she is from Brazil) tells about how she stepped outside her apt. one morning in sweats, and a few students who needed help with a maintenence issue asked if she was a janitor and could help them. She began crying because she stood there with a Master's degree, highly educated, with a high paying job and was reduced to a second class citizen. "I'm not a god damn janitor!"

I nearly blew my stack. How dare she put down the people who work on this campus who work as custodians smply because they don't have the kind of money and education that she is fortunate enough to have. Why is being mistaken for a custodian embarassing? I happen to talk to the custodians who work in my part of complex at least twice a week, and I find them to be some of the friendliest people. I've talked to several at length about their families, their goals for the future, where they grew up, holidays, projects going on at the University, and I don't feel as if I have to condescend to get on their supposed 'level'...but apparently this CC, in all her glory and education, feels that being seen as a janitor is the ultimate insult. Well **** YOU and your self righteousness. You're no better than anyone else who has prejudice.

Our staff meeting yesterday dealt with the Le Mun Wa presentation. Our Hall Director (White, Jewish, Heterosexual, Female) who I actually like quite a bit outside of this topic (and who I've debated this topic with on several occasions) began the meeting by saying that we would be dealing with a very controversial topic, and that if you didn't agree with the opinions being expressed, "tough. Sit there and fake it if you have to."

We then did a fishbowl about the Le Mun Wa presentation, and dealt with some of the topics that came up. We went around, and she began asking certain people for their opinions (mainly my building partner, who is a black woman) and a friend of mine who is in another building (Korean American woman). That to me seems like a no-no right there...asking for the "Black Opinion", etc. But we go on. My building partner told about how she feels at the University...how she feels that she is ignored by professors, and that she has just learned to accept it and go about her business. She talks about how the only thing motivating her is the thought of graduation. She says she is tired of feeling as if no one at this University wants her here or values her, and that is why every day after class she goes to "The Booth" (a euphemism for a place in one of our centres where a large group of black friends are always hanging out between classes) so she can feel like a real person and feel heard. She says that she feels that she can never truly be friends with a white person becuase she will always feel as if they are judging her, or not really wanting her friendship.

This absolutely breaks my heart, not because I 'get it' now...but because prior to this night I considered her a good friend. I greatly enjoy her company, and think she is a wonderful person, and have never been able to work so well with someone in a job (we were randomly assigned our buildings). So now I can no longer feel as if she is my friend...now I must assume that she is not, because she has just said that she cannot be friends with white people. How depressing is that?

But what really drives me crazy is that this is not seen as racism. I'm labeled a racist becuase I "ignore" the "racism I have inside me" and judge people as individuals. What Residence Life would like us to do is to ignore history, ignore law, ignore percentages and statistics, ignore all logic, and when we're done with that we are to Build Up racism, and then work to destroy it.

There are a thousand other examples I can give that aren't about black and white...issues like religion, gender, etc. which adhere to the same basic principle of the reslife image of diversity. If you're in the minority - you can be a racist against the majority. That is your right and duty. If you're in the majority - you can't be a racist, but further, you must go out of your way to do things to prove that you're not a racist.

"Breaking Down the Imagined Walls of Racism - - The New White Man's Burden."

Finally, I'd just like to say that I realize that racism exists. But it is de facto racism, which can only be faught at an individual level.

We will be revisiting this topic weekly "until we have finished it"

I could seriously write another 100 pages on this topic, and how mad it has made me....and if it weren't for the fact that I seriously fear for my candidacy as a Hall Director next year, I'd write it now. Instead, I'll wait until I'm done with my career in Residence Life.

Thanks if you read all of that!

Q Classic · November 19, 2003, 17:52

so what you're saying is that you're sick and tired of being called a racist because you're hwaaat?

yeah, makes me glad i'm not white. i mean, i can say deliberately inflammatory things about slopes without any repercussions simply because i'm a gook...

but more seriously... i agree, pc and "sensitivity" has gone so far that it makes absolutely no sense anymore.

Dis · November 19, 2003, 17:55

Vesayen · November 19, 2003, 17:58

I can sympathize with your situation....

Anyone who tells me im racist can go F off-minorities claiming white men are evil are the biggest proponent of racism out there. The vast majority of white males are very carefyll to make it clear they are NOT racist.

I am not racist towards anyone, nore are any of my friends- but apparently white men are all evil irregardless.

Arrian · November 19, 2003, 18:00

I did read all of it, Orange. And I feel for you. What you describe is insanity.

-Arrian

Vesayen · November 19, 2003, 18:00

Quote:

[SIZE=1] She says that she feels that she can never truly be friends with a white person becuase she will always feel as if they are judging her, or not really wanting her friendship.

To be honest I dont even see people according to their race... this woman is just very insecure.

Q Classic · November 19, 2003, 18:01

race doesn't matter--shouldn't matter. the fact that some keep focusing on it... well, that's where the problem lies.

Vesayen · November 19, 2003, 18:04

Exactly.

Dis · November 19, 2003, 18:05

I'm just so glad I'm not part of that world.

I like working in the real world. Race isn't an issue where I work.

Though I can't say I don't get bored with my job.

Anyway, just grin and bear it.

Arrian · November 19, 2003, 18:15

I don't think "grin and bear it" is the best way to go. Well, it is if Orange wants to *make sure* he keeps his job, and thinks he can handle keeping quiet about what he really thinks.

I couldn't do that. I'd be miserable. And I have a hunch he will be too.

-Arrian

Caligastia · November 19, 2003, 18:20

Very interesting stuff Orange. Glad to see you don't just go along with the glassy-eyed utopians when it comes to recognising the hypocrisy of those who claim to be for 'diversity'.

chequita guevara · November 19, 2003, 18:25

Yup. It shore sucks to be part of the ruling race and gender. Poor pitiful me.

Q Classic · November 19, 2003, 18:27

is the ruling race and gender always evil and racist?

mrmitchell · November 19, 2003, 18:27

Quote:

Yup. It shore sucks to be part of the ruling race and gender. Poor pitiful me.

I wouldn't call us "ruling" by a long shot if we take this kind of crap without more protest than lengthy Internet forum posts.

Q Classic · November 19, 2003, 18:28

is it fair that this ruling race and gender is called and tarred as racist?

orange · November 19, 2003, 18:28

Chegitz - I was really hoping you'd respond, but I was hoping you'd respond constructively. Did you read what I had to say?

I don't think reverse racism solves racism. Tell me why you think I'm wrong.

orange · November 19, 2003, 18:30

besides Che, I base it more on economics than anything else. If you're a rich black woman you have more power than I do as a middle class white man.

Dis · November 19, 2003, 18:31

Is it really reverse racism?

some of the stuff you said was racist was only borderline.

Sure their attitudes are ****ed up, but that doesn't make their attitudes racist.

Can you really be racists towards the ruling race?

Caligastia · November 19, 2003, 18:32

Whites think diversity is about ensuring all races have a fair shake, and enriching your life experience through contact with as great a variety as possible. It's painfully obvious that other races don't see it that way.

chequita guevara · November 19, 2003, 18:34

Quote:

Originally posted by Q Cubed
is it fair that this ruling race and gender is called and tarred as racist?

Does it ****ing matter? I've got a $60K a year job, based, in part, on being a white man. Boo ****ing hoo. Someone called me a racists. Guess I'll cry all the way to the bank.

Dis · November 19, 2003, 18:34

yes but whites will keep forcing the issue anyways

whether the other races like it or not.

It's like white people never went up to other races and actually asked them what they wanted in life. They imposed what they thought the other races wanted.

chequita guevara · November 19, 2003, 18:35

Quote:

Originally posted by orange
besides Che, I base it more on economics than anything else. If you're a rich black woman you have more power than I do as a middle class white man.

Yes, and no. Who's more likely to be stopped by the police driving a new car? Who's more likely to be followed in the store by the store ****? Hell, even Oprah get's denied access to some of the private shops.

Q Classic · November 19, 2003, 18:36

Quote:

Does it ****ing matter? I've got a $60K a year job, based, in part, on being a white man. Boo ****ing hoo. Someone called me a racists. Guess I'll cry all the way to the bank.

i'd say it does. the sooner we ditch all of this hullaballoo over who's what race and what race did what to whose uncle's race because that race was evil and racist, the sooner we can actually be closer to a colorblind and egalitarian society.

Dis · November 19, 2003, 18:36

I hate to say it, but Che has a point.

Until we reach the point where whites don't have advantages based on their skin color, the point is moot..

Just feel guilty like the rest of us and deal with it

being called a racist is the least thing you have to deal with. Other races have to deal with worse.

Q Classic · November 19, 2003, 18:36

and besides, i wouldn't like to be charged with something i'm innocent of.

mrmitchell · November 19, 2003, 18:37

Quote:

Can you really be racists towards the ruling race?

Yes.

Quote:

Does it ****ing matter? I've got a $60K a year job, based, in part, on being a white man. Boo ****ing hoo. Someone called me a racists. Guess I'll cry all the way to the bank.

But is it fair? Whether it matters is irrelevant in this discussion.

chequita guevara · November 19, 2003, 18:37

Quote:

Originally posted by orange
Did you read what I had to say?

I did, and you had a long post, which deserves a long answer, one I can't give you right now. My flip replies were to others' flip posts.

Q Classic · November 19, 2003, 18:37

why should i feel guilty? i'm a minority.

i get to be racist all i want.

mrmitchell · November 19, 2003, 18:38

Quote:

Yes, and no. Who's more likely to be stopped by the police driving a new car? Who's more likely to be followed in the store by the store ****? Hell, even Oprah get's denied access to some of the private shops.

It isn't my fault other members of my race act like a55holes. In fact, do better: don't divide it into white or black, divide it into "*******" or "non-*******". You'll get much better (and fairer!) results then.

chequita guevara · November 19, 2003, 18:41

Quote:

Originally posted by mrmitchell
But is it fair? Whether it matters is irrelevant in this discussion.

Of course its not fair. I shouldn't be paid more because most of my ancestors came from Western Europe and I have a piece of flesh dangling between my legs, but that's the way it is.

I have power, they have words. Power is the difference between racism and prejudice. I have the power to benifit from race prejudice, i.e., I benefit from racism. People can make assuptions about my character because I'm white, but when it comes down to it, I have more power over them than they do over me.

That's the ugly truth.