Insults and Put Downs. Know Any Good Ones? - Page 3

Solver · November 25, 2003, 08:49

Quote:

suchij potrach pedoras suka blat pashol nakhuj suka pezdarozhaja

I wonder if this gets me banned.

Rest assured, I am very tempted. I only regret that Ming could never be explained that, because English doesn't contain nearly enough words to get accross the beauty and elegance of your statement

.

Dry · November 25, 2003, 09:57

- Evade d'bocal (Jar escapee)
- Rabote de l'encephale (Planed from the encephalon).
- Rescape d'pillule/capote (Pill/Rubber survivor).

Richelieu · November 25, 2003, 10:17

You have a face made for radio.

SlowwHand · November 25, 2003, 10:40

Quote:

Originally posted by MrFun
Slowwhand -- just stick with your favorite one-word insult;

jackass.

I can't.
That bastardly jackass Ming threatened my well-being.
The punk.

Ming · November 25, 2003, 10:41

Quote:

Originally posted by SlowwHand
I can't.
That bastardly jackass Ming threatened my well-being.
The punk.

That's right

Bereta_Eder · November 25, 2003, 11:16

When God was raining brains you held an umbrella

Starchild · November 25, 2003, 11:19

www.insultmonger.com

My current favourite is "le réalité et toi, vous ne vous entendez pas, n'est-ce pas?"

Spec · November 25, 2003, 11:21

You are so stupid, you thought a quarter back was a refund!

You are so ugly that when you tried to join an ugly contest they said:"Sorry, no professionals"

To all you virgins.....Thanks for NOTHING!

Any similarity between you and a human is purely coincidental.

Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.

Spec · November 25, 2003, 11:23

Don't you love nature, despite what it did to you?

You are depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

If I wanted to hear from an ass, I'd fart

Spec.

SlowwHand · November 25, 2003, 11:26

Quote:

Originally posted by Ming

That's right

"I always feel like somebody's watching me,
And I have no privacy? (oh oh oh)
I always feel like somebody's watching me!
Tell me, is it just a dream?"

rah · November 25, 2003, 11:27

It's not.

Alinestra Covelia · November 25, 2003, 11:30

When all else fails, you know I'll call you.

That was marvellous. Truly you are the finest ornament to our stage.

Very few discerning people will ever know the pleasure of your company.

Brundlefly · November 25, 2003, 11:36

Ya know, I've started threads like this before and the mods have shut them down almost immediately. People like MrFun and Solver have come along and complained and gotten them shut down. But for Slowwhand, the thread stays alive. The mods do play favorites here. The definition of spam here at ACS all depends on who is doing the spamming....

I like this thread. I find it entertaining and I am not asking to have it closed. I'm just pointing out the double standard.

chequita guevara · November 25, 2003, 11:42

I'll bet Oscar Wilde could be mined for some beautiful put-downs.

MrFun · November 25, 2003, 12:41

Quote:

Originally posted by SlowwHand

I can't.
That bastardly jackass Ming threatened my well-being.
The punk.

Oh -- ok, well then carry on.

Japher · November 25, 2003, 12:49

Your the wad that should of been swallowed.

You should of been the poster boy for abortion.

Your mama's so dumb it takes her an hour and a half to watch 60 Minutes.

My personal favorite: Oh, yea!!!

Are you stupid, or do you just look that way?

Japher · November 25, 2003, 12:57

I need to go to the Sloww and take a Hand...(proceed to the bathroom)

Ecthy · November 25, 2003, 13:10

Wel Sloww, you just proved how old you really are

MikeH · November 25, 2003, 13:19

Comebacks and put downs are all about being witty in context. Stock lines will always sound lame.

Japher · November 25, 2003, 13:21

Quote:

Stock lines will always sound lame.

I know you are but what am I?

SlowwHand · November 25, 2003, 13:28

Quote:

Originally posted by bfg9000
Ya know, I've started threads like this before and the mods have shut them down almost immediately. People like MrFun and Solver have come along and complained and gotten them shut down. But for Slowwhand, the thread stays alive. The mods do play favorites here. The definition of spam here at ACS all depends on who is doing the spamming....

I like this thread. I find it entertaining and I am not asking to have it closed. I'm just pointing out the double standard.

Will you spend time in the cooler with me every time?

Stuie · November 25, 2003, 15:06

I think we can all take a lesson from Sergeant Hartman in Full Metal Jacket:

HARTMAN: What's your excuse?
COWBOY: Sir, excuse for what, sir?
HARTMAN: I'm asking the ****ing questions here, Private. Do you understand?!
COWBOY: Sir, yes, sir!
HARTMAN: Well thank you very much! Can I be in charge for a while?
COWBOY: Sir, yes, sir!
HARTMAN: Are you shook up? Are you nervous?
COWBOY: Sir, I am, sir!
HARTMAN: Do I make you nervous?
COWBOY: Sir!
HARTMAN: Sir, what? Were you about to call me an *******?!
COWBOY: Sir, no, sir!
HARTMAN: How tall are you, Private?
COWBOY: Sir, five foot nine, sir!
HARTMAN: Five foot nine? I didn't know they stacked **** that high! You trying to squeeze an inch in on me somewhere, huh?
COWBOY: Sir, no, sir.
HARTMAN: Bullshit! It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your mama's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress! I think you've been cheated! Where in hell are you from anyway, Private?
COWBOY: Sir, Texas, sir!
HARTMAN: Holy dogshit! Texas! Only steers and queers come from Texas, Private Cowboy! And you don't look much like a steer to me, so that kinda narrows it down! Do you suck dicks!
COWBOY: Sir, no, sir!
HARTMAN: Are you a peter-puffer?
COWBOY: Sir, no, sir!
HARTMAN: I'll bet you're the kind of guy that would **** a person in the ass and not even have the goddam common courtesy to give him a reach-around! I'll be watching you!

Sergeant HARTMAN walks down the line to another recruit, a tall, overtweight boy.

HARTMAN: Did your parents have any children that lived?
PYLE: Sir, yes, sir!
HARTMAN: I'll bet they regret that! You're so ugly you could be a modern art masterpiece! What's your name, fatbody?
PYLE: Sir, Leonard Lawrence, sir!
HARTMAN: Lawrence? Lawrence, what, of Arabia?
PYLE: Sir, no, sir!
HARTMAN: That name sounds like royalty! Are you royalty?
PYLE: Sir, no, sir!
HARTMAN: Do you suck dicks?
PYLE: Sir, no, sir!
HARTMAN: Bullshit! I'll bet you could suck a golf ball through a garden hose!
PYLE: Sir, no, sir!
HARTMAN: I don't like the name Lawrence! Only faggots and sailors are called Lawrence! From now on you're Gomer Pyle!

SpencerH · November 25, 2003, 15:45

I love that scene. Good clean fun for the whole family.

Ben Kenobi · November 25, 2003, 18:09

Quote:

You're so ugly you could be a modern art masterpiece!

LMFAO!

In this book I just read.

"You're like Jesus. Jesus was just as wise an infant, as when he was grown."