December 2, 2003, 00:05
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#61
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Local Time: 15:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: jihadding against Danish Feta
Posts: 6,182
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Urban Ranger
Bah, you oaf, mine was an entry.
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6/10
Not as stylish as Boris' before you, but just as intriguing and original. What kind of story could begin by that opening sentence?
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"I have been reading up on the universe and have come to the conclusion that the universe is a good thing." -- Dissident
"I never had the need to have a boner." -- Dissident
"I have never cut off my penis when I was upset over a girl." -- Dis
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December 2, 2003, 01:58
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#62
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King
Local Time: 08:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: Winnipeg
Posts: 1,166
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The cockroach realized the horrible truth: he had metamorphosised overnight into George W. Bush.
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Quote:
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You should at least spell "punctuation" correctly when criticizing people over it.
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This is the winner so far. 8/10
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There's nothing wrong with the dream, my friend, the problem lies with the dreamer.
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December 2, 2003, 03:32
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#63
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King
Local Time: 07:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: May 1999
Location: Lost
Posts: 1,020
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wow, i guess mine didn't even get a ranking? lol
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"Mal nommer les choses, c'est accroître le malheur du monde" - Camus (thanks Davout)
"I thought you must be dead ..." he said simply. "So did I for a while," said Ford, "and then I decided I was a lemon for a couple of weeks. A kept myself amused all that time jumping in and out of a gin and tonic."
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December 2, 2003, 04:30
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#64
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Local Time: 15:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: jihadding against Danish Feta
Posts: 6,182
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Uncle Sparky
The cockroach realized the horrible truth: he had metamorphosised overnight into George W. Bush.
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ROFL!
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"I have been reading up on the universe and have come to the conclusion that the universe is a good thing." -- Dissident
"I never had the need to have a boner." -- Dissident
"I have never cut off my penis when I was upset over a girl." -- Dis
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December 2, 2003, 04:39
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#65
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Emperor
Local Time: 08:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: San Antonio
Posts: 18,269
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Bridges I knew, but I had never thought to look for the bait at the end of the hook.
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Scouse Git (2) LaFayette and Adam Smith you will be missed
"All my own perception of beauty both in majesty and simplicity is founded upon Our Lady." - JRR Tolkein
Get busy living or get busy dying.
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December 2, 2003, 08:17
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#66
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Prince
Local Time: 13:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Please make all cheques payable to Whaleboy
Posts: 853
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This isn't the YMCA is it?
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"I work in IT so I'd be buggered without a computer" - Words of wisdom from Provost Harrison
"You can be wrong AND jewish" - Wiglaf :love:
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December 2, 2003, 08:52
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#67
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King
Local Time: 15:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: of genial epicuri
Posts: 1,570
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The End.
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Que l’Univers n’est qu’un défaut dans la pureté de Non-être.
- Paul Valery
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December 2, 2003, 09:02
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#68
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Emperor
Local Time: 23:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 2,988
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As She saw eternity sprawled before her, the entire contents of Everything entered Her mind, but the one thought to stay in Her head was: "Why are there so many mistakes?".
EDIT: I have a penchant for unnescesary words
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December 2, 2003, 09:47
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#69
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Emperor
Local Time: 14:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: of home-made blueberry muffins
Posts: 7,200
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"He was lost: spinning in an incomprehensible world that resisted his attempts to find something that made sense and eluded him when he tried to impose a logical framework upon it."
I came up with this last night when trying to explain what my boss is like. 
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"When we grow up we'll both be soldiers, and our horses will not be toys,
And I wonder if we'll remember when we were two little boys!"
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December 2, 2003, 09:50
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#70
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Emperor
Local Time: 15:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: CLOWNS WIT DA DOWNS 4 LIFE YO!
Posts: 5,301
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Merrily skip we forth towards doom and beyond.
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"Spirit merges with matter to sanctify the universe. Matter transcends to return to spirit. The interchangeability of matter and spirit means the starlit magic of the outermost life of our universe becomes the soul-light magic of the innermost life of our self." - Dennis Kucinich, candidate for the U. S. presidency
"That’s the future of the Democratic Party: providing Republicans with a number of cute (but not that bright) comfort women." - Adam Yoshida, Canada's gift to the world
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December 2, 2003, 11:46
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#71
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Settler
Local Time: 08:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: MY WORDS ARE BACKED WITH A THREE-LEGGED CAT THAT HAS WORMS
Posts: 16
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"When Chancellor Bismarck finally woke up after a night of heavy drinking, he realized that maybe it wasn't such a good idea to give Catherine of the Russians the secret to Satellites, and a Uranium resource, for her 'service' the previous night.
__________________
Pi = 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375 10582097494459230781640628620899862803482534211706 79821480865132823066470938446095505822317253594081 2848111...
Approximately.
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December 2, 2003, 22:18
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#72
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Emperor
Local Time: 07:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: of the Big Apple
Posts: 4,109
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And even as the chipmunck screamed it realized that it was far too late, for the barrel of flamming monkeys was already upon Mrs. Huggleflim.
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If you don't like reality, change it! me
"Oh no! I am bested!" Drake :(
"it is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong" Voltaire
"Patriotism is a pernecious, psychopathic form of idiocy" George Bernard Shaw
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December 2, 2003, 22:31
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#73
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Warlord
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: I eat my own poop
Posts: 216
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As I looked in the mirror at my sagging love handles, my thoughts drift back to Jean-Claude and that Bordeaux dumpster.
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"Dave, if medicine tasted good, I'd be pouring cough syrup on my pancakes." -Jimmy James, Newsradio
"Your plans to find love, fortune, and happiness utterly ignore the Second Law Of Thermodynamics."-Horiscope from The Onion
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December 2, 2003, 22:32
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#74
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Deity
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 21,822
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"It would have been all right if only you had let me yiff the otter."
(probably gets a 2/10 - furry fanfic  )
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[Obama] is either a troll or has no ****ing clue how government works - GePap
Later amendments to the Constitution don't supersede earlier amendments - GePap
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December 2, 2003, 22:41
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#75
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Emperor
Local Time: 13:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Mu Mu Land
Posts: 6,570
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Quote:
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"It's another Beautiful day in Lake Wobegon."
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 It's been to long:
Where all the men are strong, all the women beautiful, and all the children above average...
Love that show 
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Quote:
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And even as the chipmunck screamed it realized that it was far too late, for the barrel of flamming monkeys was already upon Mrs. Huggleflim.
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Now that is workable Had it been a squirrel instead of a chipmunk you'd of gotten Boshko's vote too... This is my pick 10/10
My contribution:
Threadjack, what threadjack!
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December 2, 2003, 23:07
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#76
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Emperor
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Jul 1999
Posts: 5,605
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"Jack died one fine day in August."
"I too was in love once -- long ago, when I was still young and naive enough to believe in love..."
"Pathological dependency cycles occur in state-space planners when control rules cannot efficiently determine a maximal matching for a bipartite operator/binding graph."
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"For just twenty cents a day, we'll moisten your dreams with man urine." -Space Ghost
Last edited by loinburger; December 2, 2003 at 23:18.
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December 2, 2003, 23:43
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#77
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Emperor
Local Time: 01:25
Local Date: November 3, 2010
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Mad.
Posts: 4,142
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"When things cease to be dangerous, it loses it's demand, as was apparent in our case"
"Fiction writers can't be trusted. They make things up."
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December 3, 2003, 00:46
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#78
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Settler
Local Time: 08:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: MY WORDS ARE BACKED WITH A THREE-LEGGED CAT THAT HAS WORMS
Posts: 16
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Quote:
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Originally posted by ICBM
"When Chancellor Bismarck finally woke up after a night of heavy drinking, he realized that maybe it wasn't such a good idea to give Catherine of the Russians the secret to Satellites, and a Uranium resource, for her 'service' the previous night.
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I think my opening sentence may have potential on the Civ3 stories forum...
__________________
Pi = 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375 10582097494459230781640628620899862803482534211706 79821480865132823066470938446095505822317253594081 2848111...
Approximately.
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December 3, 2003, 01:23
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#79
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King
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: The 3rd best place to live in the USA.
Posts: 2,744
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I was wondering when someone would catch.
"Lonestar knew that due to all the religious Christians were disappearing, it could mean only one thing; Thor had come for vengence."
(Oh yeah, I'm going to Hell)
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With such viral bias, you're opinion is thus rendered useless. -Shrapnel12, on my "bias" against the SS.
And any man who may be asked in this century what he did to make his life worth while, I think can respond with a good deal of pride and satisfaction: "I served in the United States Navy!"
"Well, the truth is, Brian, we can't solve global warming because I ****ing changed light bulbs in my house. It's because of something collective." --Barack Obama
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December 4, 2003, 04:06
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#80
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King
Local Time: 08:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: Winnipeg
Posts: 1,166
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Quote:
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"It would have been all right if only you had let me yiff the otter."
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hmmmmmm... I actually understand that sentence. John Waters (yes, that John Waters) taught me to speak Furry many years ago... and there shall be absolutely no otter yiffing here at Apolyton !
__________________
There's nothing wrong with the dream, my friend, the problem lies with the dreamer.
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December 4, 2003, 14:46
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#81
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Emperor
Local Time: 15:25
Local Date: November 2, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2000
Posts: 8,491
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It was a normal day. 
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