it's the revival of the corrupt wish game (II) - Page 12

Kuciwalker · December 29, 2003, 23:25

Q Classic · December 29, 2003, 23:40

he isn't a snark anymore. in fact, he's in such a great mood, that he thinks everybody deserves a vacation at mingapulco.

i wish silverware never had to be polished.

Theben · December 29, 2003, 23:57

Quote:

Originally posted by Q Cubed
he isn't a snark anymore. in fact, he's in such a great mood, that he thinks everybody deserves a vacation at mingapulco.

I'm not sure which is worse: Ming being grumpy, or Ming being 'playful'...

ICBM · December 30, 2003, 20:25

Quote:

Originally posted by Q Cubed
i wish silverware never had to be polished.

Granted. Silverware never has to be polished. Unfortunately, the "miracle" chemical that is invented to allow silverware to never be polished also dissolves into food and is very toxic...

I wish I could get away with never brushing my teeth and never going to the dentist without any harm to my teeth.

Kuciwalker · December 30, 2003, 21:14

Granted. You have no teeth

I wish I could view 100 posts per thread.

Shogun Gunner · December 30, 2003, 22:15

Granted. But it's at 4 point font size.

I wish humans could see the entire spectrum of light, not just the so-called "visible spectrum".

Mr. President · December 30, 2003, 22:29

Granted.

But now you can see the truth: that ultraviolet light carries swarms of miniscule ugly creatures. It drives you insane and you hang yourself from the chandelier.

I wish for the ability to read minds.

JohnT · December 30, 2003, 22:38

Granted. You can now read your SO's mind during sex... and you find out she thinks Willow is cuter than Buffy too.

I wish for a million dollars.

ICBM · December 30, 2003, 23:14

Granted. But it's a million counterfeit dollars, and you are soon arrested by the Secret Service, and never seen again.

I wish my cat wouldn't shed his hair on my bed.

Shogun Gunner · December 30, 2003, 23:15

Granted. But it's awarded on year 2350 dollars, discounting for inflation, that leaves you with about $7.91 in today's money. Enjoy.

I wish I could perfectly recreate entire songs - of my choosing - in my head at digital CD quality with control over volume.

Shogun Gunner · December 30, 2003, 23:16

damn x-post. sorry icbm

ICBM · December 31, 2003, 00:43

Granted. Unfortunately, there's no stop button, so the songs play in your head continuously, forever. You eventually go insane as a result.

I repeat my wish.

Q Classic · December 31, 2003, 01:36

it doesn't. it sheds it on your toothbrush and boxers/briefs instead.

Q Classic · December 31, 2003, 01:37

i wish the seats at the movie theater were more comfortable, because my ass hurts from watching lotr a second time.

Kuciwalker · December 31, 2003, 01:50

Granted. However, they are so incredibly comfortable that people decide to rip them off the floor and take them home, so you have to sit on the (gum-covered) floor.

I wish the OTF counted in your postcount.

mrmitchell · December 31, 2003, 02:17

Granted. Now being Diety isn't a sign of anything other than being another OT spamming schmuck.

Theben · December 31, 2003, 10:11

I wish mr. mitchell had made a wish.

ICBM · December 31, 2003, 13:29

Granted. He did, but it was that you would be attacked by a polar bear.

I wish Theben would be attacked by a polar bear.

Theben · December 31, 2003, 13:33

Granted. It's actually a furry dressed as a polar bear, so I manage to survive despite being sexually traumatized.

I wish ICBM was attacked by a thermonuclear warhead.

Bugs ****ing Bunny · December 31, 2003, 13:35

Let it be so. Did you know you were neighbours?

I wish every day was Christmas day and everyone gave me loads of really cool presents and sex.

Theben · December 31, 2003, 13:38

They do. Unfortunately (or maybe you DO enjoy it) they give you really cool sex presents; things like used condoms, IUDS, and ****ed-on magazines.

I wish ICBM wasn't living in my blast radius.

Mercator · December 31, 2003, 14:09

Granted. Unfortunately that nuclear warhead hits him when he's going on holiday. To be precise, when his airplane is flying right over your house.

I wish Markos and Dan would become filthy rich, so they can ban all ads and pop-ups on Apolyton.

ICBM · December 31, 2003, 16:58

Granted. They become filthy rich, but they decide to keep the ads and popups, so they can make even more money. Don't you love greed?

I wish Walmart was illegal.

Q Classic · December 31, 2003, 18:10

walmart becomes illegal. kmart takes its places as the super-hyper-mega-mart chain that eats souls.

i wish i had a gigabit lan router.

ICBM · December 31, 2003, 22:44

Quote:

Originally posted by Q Cubed
walmart becomes illegal. kmart takes its places as the super-hyper-mega-mart chain that eats souls.

That's ok with me. There aren't any K-Marts here in this part of Maryland...

Q Classic · January 1, 2004, 01:03

right now, sure. but wait till walmart turns illegal...

ICBM · January 1, 2004, 01:12

Happy New Year...

Granted. You now have a brand new gigabit lan router. Unfortunately, you can only connect it to a ten-year old computer that runs Windows 3.1.

I wish I didn't eat that shrimp earlier tonight.

Q Classic · January 1, 2004, 01:17

you didn't. you ate old cheap guano instead.

i wish all women in the world would turn absolutely gorgeous, and that one of them would want to spend the rest of her natural life with me as a loving wife.

ICBM · January 1, 2004, 01:33

Granted. All the women in the world are now absolutely gorgeous, including the 95-year-old ones. Your new loving wife is one of them, so you don't have long with her, since she doesn't have much time left in her natural lifespan.

I wish my cat didn't smell so bad.

Mr. Harley · January 1, 2004, 02:28

Your cat doesn't. The genie heard your wish, gave you the new desmellerizer treatment, so when your cat rubs against you, the nuisance leaves all it's scent on you. You now smell like the cat did.

I wish I hadn't had my old thunderbird mb eat a second power supply.