it's the revival of the corrupt wish game (II) - Page 6

Mr. Harley · December 10, 2003, 05:22

You new AI code takes over the world. Decides you should be the ruler. When you don't cooperate, you are deleted.

I wish my little girl was so precocious that she figured out how to use a potty seat at nine months (right now).

Shogun Gunner · December 10, 2003, 12:30

Granted, but she figured out how to put your important papers there first.

I wish I could control the color of my hair.

Theben · December 10, 2003, 14:06

Granted, but you must 1st buy Just for Mentm for it to work.

I wish there was a holiday where an insane fascist gave bananas to good little girls and boys by throwing them out of a helicopter.

Q Classic · December 10, 2003, 14:11

granted. good little girls and boys are thrown out of helicopters into banana republics below.

babykiller.

i wish that people would just go away and leave me alone, because i'm sick and tired of fixing up their idiot mistakes on the computer.

Shogun Gunner · December 10, 2003, 14:27

Granted. People all go away from you...never again does someone talk to you again.

I wish my daughter wasn't sick.

Spec · December 10, 2003, 14:31

Granted. She is fully healed with an amazing boost of energy for the rest of her life. Never again will you do something in peace.

I wish I was at homw right now.

Spec.

Q Classic · December 10, 2003, 14:34

congratulations. you're now in homw, capital of north elbonia.

i wish all pointy-haired bosses would die.

Spec · December 10, 2003, 14:43

Granted, you die.

I wish I was at HOME!

Spec.

Theben · December 10, 2003, 15:17

Granted. You are at home. Little did you realize that your new home is a small, cramped cubicle. You now live at work.

Theben · December 10, 2003, 15:18

btw, I meant that the BANANAS were to be thrown from the helicopter!

I wish that I was singing in the rain.

Q Classic · December 10, 2003, 15:29

you are. but it's acid rain. your new nickname is twoface, but that's because the whole top of your head is burned away.

i wish that deliberate misunderstandings were always funny.

Shogun Gunner · December 10, 2003, 20:09

Granted. But unintentional misunderstandings are now never funny. Spontaneity is lost and a certain enjoyment in life is gone forever.

I wish they could really reattach Ted Williams head to his body.

Q Classic · December 10, 2003, 20:51

granted, but 1000 years from now, fry and leela will never be able to meet his head in a jar. it will also turn out that fry is related to you somehow, and the shame of that blacklists you from any future breeding.

i wish idiots would never get on idiot tv programs like wheel of fortune. i mean, come on... we had a stupid woman say that brotherly love, cream cheese, and the liberty bell were all in new york for chrissakes. anybody with half a brain would know that the correct answer is boston. jeebus.

Shogun Gunner · December 10, 2003, 21:04

Granted. Now idiots get on Jeopardy and the really smart people go to Wheel of Fortune. Both shows are ruined (perhaps they already were).

I wish there was only one time zone.

ICBM · December 10, 2003, 22:06

Granted. You now live in the land of the midnight sun.

I wish I had chickens had three wings, so there would be more chicken wings to eat.

Shogun Gunner · December 10, 2003, 22:10

Granted, but that wing grows out the chicken's butt...and that tastes like ....well sh1t.

I wish the helium atom had five electrons.

Mr. Harley · December 11, 2003, 04:23

It does - the resulting change in the atomic nucleus permitting this means stars burn out immediately upon starting fusion. Life does not evolve.

I wish my little girl would peacefully, and healthily, take her nap.

Theben · December 11, 2003, 04:54

She does. In fact, when she wakes up she's so well rested that she bounces off the walls for the next 12 hours straight.

I wish someone would clean my apartment.

Urban Ranger · December 11, 2003, 05:16

A big fat ugly woman comes in and do the cleaning for you. In fact, she would do the cooking and other household chores. But she also makes your apartment her home and you can't get rid of her.

I wish I got to see the Sunshine Girl more often.

Mr. Harley · December 11, 2003, 05:37

Theban - unfortunately, that's exactly what happens.

Q Classic · December 11, 2003, 08:16

you do. when you're 95, and she's 96, she moves in next to you in the retirement home for mentally addled old people. you don't remember who she is, but you get to see her every day, drooling and staring off into space.

i wish there was some drug that was legal and gave you a controlled high, and had no side effects.

duke o' york · December 11, 2003, 08:50

[Booze you dope! You just have to drink enough for there to be no side effects!

]

Er, there is, but the side effect of having no side effects means that you can be high all the time and so the scientists who discovered it don't ever bother to put it on the market and just sit around getting high all day.

I wish that Elton John would self-combust in a controlled explosion - LIVE ON TV!

Theben · December 11, 2003, 10:37

Elton starts to burn during an AIDS awareness concert, live on TV. While you watch captivated, your TV explodes, sending shards of metal and glass deep into your eyes and face. Although you'll be dead, I can tell you they managed to put out the fire on Elton, all he got was a tiny 1st degree burn. And it was your neighbor who rigged your TV to explode, controlling it remotely from his living room (apparently he was upset your fence is built 1 1/2 inches into his property).

Theben · December 11, 2003, 10:38

I wish that nOObs and in fact everyone spelled my online name correctly.

Q Classic · December 11, 2003, 10:46

theybun gets his name spelled correctly because he changes its spelling to include wildcards: th*b*n.
unfortunately, people get tired of doing this, and rename him, against his will, ******.

i wish i had a massively powerful rail gun to completely **** **** up with. traffic bad? no problem, i'll clear a path with my rail gun...

duke o' york · December 11, 2003, 10:50

You've got a rail gun, but you can't use it against traffic because it runs on rails...

I wish I had a fence, and a neighbour to share it with!

Theben · December 11, 2003, 11:17

Several years from now, you have your own home, and a fence, and a neighbor. He seems to complain about something a lot.

I wish that the Japanese "beckoning cat" charm was saying "Fight the Power!"

Theben · December 11, 2003, 11:18

Quote:

Originally posted by Q Cubed
theybun gets his name spelled correctly because he changes its spelling to include wildcards: th*b*n.

****, at this point maybe that's what I should do.

-Jrabbit · December 11, 2003, 13:49

Quote:

Originally posted by Theben
I wish that nOObs and in fact everyone spelled my online name correctly.

Since I know it annoys you, I vow to misspell your name until you get rid of that anime avatar,

Thebne.

Theben · December 11, 2003, 14:04

We'll just see who can last longer.