Comments on Unity

[Clear Skies]

Feel free to post your comments on any part of Unity here - I still need comments on the first part as well!

[Clear Skies]

C'mon, please, I could do with some feedback - negative as well as positive is always welcome...

[Maniac]

Brilliant story! If I landed on AC and had to choose between the 14 factions, I'd choose your consciousness any minute.

[Clear Skies]

Thanx Maniac!
What makes them so attractive to you? What is it specifically that you like about them?

[Maniac]

Well, um, I think most people (for example Rachelle's aunt) see the Consciousness wrongly as some Star Trek Borg-like hive mind where you are just some un-thinking slave-automaton, following the orders of some central mind. At least if I don't totally misinterpret you, you described the Consciousness as I see it. The members of the Consiousness are still individuals. As you say:

"All the algorithm did was enhance your abilities."

As I see it, an algorithm increases your intellectual capacities (or gives you a number of brand new abilities), gives you more self-control, and makes it possible to communicate mind-to-mind with other "cyborgs". However, and that's the mistake many make, because you can communicate "telepathically" with other beings, that doesn't mean you loose your self, your individuality.

Furthermore, the Consciousness values are almost exactly the same as mine: logic, rationality, search for knowledge and understanding, efficiency, calmness and self-control (that is, you controlling your body, thoughts and emotions, not the other way around), freedom and individuality. Indeed, I think such a faction is at the same time the one which gives you the largest freedom and the largest togetherness, as you say yourself at the end of your story.

"Three minds leapt and danced, just for this one moment, rejoicing in their freedom and their unity..."

This faction understands you are strongest if you efficiently work together (that's the basis of Yang's philosophy, or any communist for that matter). However, they (and every liberal guy as well) are also rational enough to realize an individual is most creative when it has a large amount of freedom. Thus creating one hive mind would inhibit the Consciousness quest: knowledge.

What else can I say about your story? The classical things, I guess (but I mean them). You really draw the reader into your story world. It's a thrilling story; I always wanted to read further. Your narrative perspective is good, most of the time seen from the point of view of a few people. And the characters of those people aren't shallow. You don't just descibe their actions (your action's good as well).

I'll repeat myself: "Brilliant story!"

M@ni@c

[Alynzia]

[aktarian]

Isn't it curious how we all see only one part of each faction. We all see Yang as bad person but nobody gives second thought about his ideology (Hive has to have some ideology-remember that saying about bayonets?). Similar with other factions. Has anybody written a story where Deirdre is portraited as fanatic with similar views as Miriam only Planet replacing God?

Similar with Spartans. You all see them as militaristic with faschist like police state ruling them. Where are Americans to proclaim that as long as you have your gun goverment can't force you to do anything and that posesion of guns is the only way to keep your freedom. Americans should see Spartans as monumet to their resistance to gun control.


And before you all attack me I ment no offense and I promise to continue my story. Been busy lately.


Have fun.

[Clear Skies]

OK, so anyone who attacks anyone else on sight should be let off the hook because 'their ideology told them to'. Hellooooo another round of Crusades if you ever get the Popeship...

I have virtually no sympathy with either Yang or Santiago. I hate police states, being an ardent pro-democracy person, and I cannot stand the idea of 'a God-given right to keep and bear arms'. That's why I gave neither of them a 'get-out clause'. No-one in my stories gets to do anything because 'oh look, my ideology just popped up this little sign saying 'do this', so I must do it!' I work by faction leader personalities, not ideology.

Sorry. My strong feelings will now end. Breathe. Calm.

[aktarian]

All faction leaders believe in what they do and will destroy anybody or anything that stands on their way. The same way Santiago would destroy faction she considers weak so will Deirdre destroy any faction that polutes Planet. Same way Yang would destroy any faction that opose his views on future society so would Morgan destroy any faction that stands between him and profit. And same way as Lal would try to overcome factionalism among humanity so will Yang try to overcome individualism for the sake of benefit of the group.


And that is beauty of SMAC. Everybody can identify to some degree with one or more factions.

[Maniac]

I have also read the continuation, which is to the same standard as its predecessor.

Continuation of Unity? Yes! Where? Where? Where?

[Sprayber]

Originally posted by aktarian
Isn't it curious how we all see only one part of each faction. We all see Yang as bad person but nobody gives second thought about his ideology (Hive has to have some ideology-remember that saying about bayonets?). Similar with other factions. Has anybody written a story where Deirdre is portraited as fanatic with similar views as Miriam only Planet replacing God?

If you go past the veil of 10 days you will find a challenge by someone to protray the leaders in a different light. There is one in which Dee has captured Morgan and is forceing him to watch as her Gian troops destroy each one of his bases. It's a fun read to see Dee give up on her peaceful intentions and go after the Morganites and then the Believers.


The story is a good one and I enjoy reading it. However, I leave the politics out of it. That's what is so great about SMAC fiction. In one story a leader can be a raving lunitic in another they can be a concerned leader. Every faction can be protrayed in a positive and negative light. There is room for both Yang and Lal to be have good and bad points. That's for the writer to decide. It is there vision that I am interested in at the moment. Keep up the good work SMAC Fanatic.

[Velociryx]

Here here! As one of the first people to have the pleasure of reading “Unity” I must agree that I’m glad to see the story continue! Your vision of the Consciousness is quite unique, and I’m anxious to watch it develop further!
-=Vel=-

[Clear Skies]

*bump* for further comments on the continuing continuation...