Civ 3 poetry

[Travathian]

Civ 3 limerick #1

Day and night I play Civ 3
Just the computer and me
My wrist hurts like hell,
head rings like a bell,
Just one more turn? Lets see

[Skanky Burns]

I once played a game of Civ
The damn computer wouldn't let me live
They sent lots of swordsmen
And busted down my doors. Then
My whole treasury i had to give.

[jadlakha]

Poetry is for homosexuals.

And your poems do suck btw.

[Skanky Burns]

jadlakha, you're not even worth a reply

Welcome to my ignore list

[Pythagoras]

If "Poetry is for homosexuals. "

and

you assert your claim that

"your poems do suck"

then you assert also that you are a good judge of poetry

therefore

jadlakha is a homosexual

[King Carp]

Do haikus count?


Japanese attack
But I never did them wrong
Glad I have rubber.

[Terser]

A tank did I build in Berlin
To punish the French for their sin
Of sending their settlers and spearmen
Into the mountains near Bremen!
Imgine my dismay, when dare do I say,
my tank was destroyed by said spearmen!

[Thomas Paine]

The missiles had sailed to Moscow the Foe,
By morning the city didst shine with a glow!
Survivors, with stones, were forced to the fight,
and many, now weary, said, 'That Einstein was right!'

[CB2034]

i once bought a game called civ3
oh how happy i thought i would be

i got the last one the day it came out
i was so happy i felt i could shout

to home i went to install and play
im so sorry jaklada is gay

to my amazement it was really buggy
and right now outside its kinda muggy

i thought after the patch civ3 would be first rate
but even now i see its not all that great

to my surprise
infocrack lies

but i will still play
until late in the day

oh how i cant wait for moo3

[MisterMuppet]

There once was an Indian called Gandhi,
in a fight he was pretty handy.
But a war with the japs,
lead to his collapse.
Cause his war Elephant was just eye candy

[MisterMuppet]

There once was a Korean called Yin.
Many whining threads he’d begin.
“Civ 3 is so lame,
Sid Meier’s to blame.”
But the reason was Yin could not Win.

[MisterMuppet]

There once was Frenchie called Joan,
Maid of Orleans they called her at home.
She would lead a merry dance,
with the generals of France,
and she wouldn’t require a comb.

[MisterMuppet]

There once was a Greek called MarkG.
Apolyton website he ran it for free.
As a Gates hater,
I use Navigator.
Unfortunately it only works with IE.

[Nexus VI]

Lately I was reading MisterMuppet
Whose name was strange indeed
On his skill at poetry I could bet
Of his rhymes I could never get rid.

I hope MrMuppet will let
My words to describe his deeds
Cause his poems on the things he met
Are so funny I could propose him a bid.

[xane]

Barbarians are Raging
Horsemen, one, two, twenty
Time to Retire

Achtung ! Motorized Transport !
Panzer will rule the world
Sh*t where is the Rubber ?

[MisterMuppet]

There once was a Persian, Xerxes.
Foreign lands his armies would seize.
With immortals not swordsmen,
He conquered all Babylon.
Until there were no more enemies.

[MisterMuppet]

There once was a Roman, Caesar.
Whose empire stretched to Persia.
His roads were all straight,
Which is handy of late.
As I travel to Segedunum by car.

[MisterMuppet]

There once was a chairman called Mao.
Who was popular in China somehow.
It wasn’t his looks,
Or little red books,
It must have been his Chicken Kung Pao.

[MisterMuppet]

There once was developer named Sid.
As fans we bought whatever he did.
What’s next from the master,
SimGolf, it’s a disaster !
Now even the Fanboyz are morbid

[hetairoi22]

I started my first game om Civ 3
I didst to know how't was gonna be,
I played and I saw that my only chance to win
was through a cult'ral victory.

I played some more, and lo
I still haven't finished that game, so
I'm playing on and on, but no time I've got
If I some more I will get shot.

[Thomas Paine]

I once had eighty-three tanks,
from which my victors gave thanks.
But by 1954,
It had become quite a chore
To move each one from the ranks.

[Thomas Paine]

There once was a Hindu named Gandhi,
who (in this game) was quite randy.
I sold him a tech,
with little regret,
For the price of a whore and some brandy.

[Thomas Paine]

The Persians invaded,
but the Japs had negated,
all their gains with a shogun's sword.

The Immortals, once fierce,
Now vigorously pierced,
Ran fleeing from the Japanese horde.

As for me, I just laughed
while the Persians ran past
my open and defenseless borders.
For it was Zulu gold
that made the Japs bold.
While my Leader gave all of the orders!

[AlrightyThen]

And Lo! burst forth a horde of Impis,
Upon the Indians, who were a bit wimpy.
At the final hour to Gandhi's aid came Lincoln,
But he demanded wine so he could continue drinkin'.

[AlrightyThen]

There once was a Cossack leader named Catherine,
Who against the Germans sent her sabres rattlin'.
But she had a doubt, so she pulled them back,
So she could use those horses in the sack.

[AlrightyThen]

Civ3, Civ3, its been 12 hours I've got to pee.
The Romans are furious', the Zules are annoyed.
Is the pressure in my bowels a ploy?
For if I leave my warm seat, surely a dire fate I will meet.
Damn my enemies to hell where is the bathroom?
If I don't go now, I'll need new Fruit of the Looms.

[AlrightyThen]

An Aztec there was, whose name was unpronounceable,
But apparenly he decided my nation was pounceable.
So upon my poor cities he did descend,
And my valiant warriors did defend,
But to the surprise of us both, with a crack of thunder,
The American F15's sent us all under.

[Colonel Kraken]

Great work, everyone! Especially MisterMuppet and Thomas Paine . . .

After the drudgery of some of the threads here, this is a nice relief. Keep up the good work!

Who says poetry is for homos . . . ?! It's called culture . . . and humor.

[Travathian]

How many culture points per day am I getting for starting this thread?

[Colonel Kraken]

Originally posted by Travathian
How many culture points per day am I getting for starting this thread?

Nice . . . .