One Sentence Story: The Escapr from the Unity - Page 2

Kassiopeia · March 9, 2002, 17:48

"Look under there more carefully, there should be one in a box labeled 'Biohazard', you know, the one we used to keep our anthrax microbes in when we were little toddlers?"

Mr. President · March 9, 2002, 19:09

"This is all I can see," Federov said, clutching a box in his hands that seemed to exude an aura of bio-hazardousness into the air around it.

Lonestar · March 9, 2002, 20:36

"Federov, you fool, those are the mission's MRE rations. If you don't get me my screwdriver and laser cutter, I'm going to space you." Zakharov snarled.

History Guy · March 9, 2002, 20:48

Without really thinking about it too much, Zakharov scooped up the radioactive boot and the biohazardous materials and added them to his concoction, saying pridefully, "Ah, my beautiful vodka is nearly complete...yes...my precious...soon I shall partake of this vodka...yeppers..."

spartak · March 10, 2002, 18:59

Meanwhile, on planet's surface a dark brooding presence was monitoring the bright lights of the escape pods' entry into the atmosphere.

History Guy · March 10, 2002, 20:22

"Oh man, hey darn it, what's with all this?" asked Albert the mindworm to one of the many millions of mindworms who were crawling around nearby.

Mr. President · March 11, 2002, 17:51

The sky lit up in fire and the very earth shook as seven large, glittering, metal objects hurtled from the stars to tear into Planet's soft outer skin.

History Guy · March 11, 2002, 18:31

One of Albert's many twins was about to offer a very clever response, but was stopped short when a Unity pod suddenly slammed down on top of the whole bloody boil, reducing all of the worms underneath to planet-pearls.

spartak · March 16, 2002, 12:11

Bastard cried Albert, I'll get you for that.

History Guy · March 16, 2002, 12:31

After taking his first gulp out of his newly brewed 'vodka', Zakharov noticed the remains of the radioactive shoe floating around, next to a half submerged disk, "Federov, you ignorant cross-eyed fool...is that my Sid Meier's Civilization III?"

spartak · March 16, 2002, 14:42

No Provost replied Fedorov, if you remember, you told me to chuck it out for being crap.

History Guy · March 17, 2002, 12:17

Just seconds before his eyes started to glow brilliantly, his hair started to frizz up, and he grew two inches in height, Provost Zakharov said, "Ah well, at least you can taste the potatoes more than the radioactive shoe..."

spartak · March 17, 2002, 12:30

Meanwhile Dierdre was wiping her lips dry.

Mr. President · March 22, 2002, 02:42

Somewhere in the cargo hold, Corazon Santiago had rolled over and over, clattering off crates and boxes, breaking both arms and several ribs; but at least her precious, precious guns were safe.

spartak · March 23, 2002, 15:59

"Pain = bad" she thought, "Guns = good" she continued.

History Guy · March 28, 2002, 17:39

As Corazon stroked her guns gently, saying such things as "My love, my own, my precious", Major Bootneck popped in, "Ah, Bootneck," she said, "Could you hand me a few tourniquets for my limbs?"

Kassiopeia · August 7, 2002, 21:26

"Sure ma'am", Bootneck replied, but then said, askingly, "but, may I ask, why on Chiron do you want feathery large-ish birds consumed usually on Thanks Giving for your limbs, ma'am?"

Mr. President · August 8, 2002, 06:38

Fortunately, Assistant Jobtech 3rd Class Domai broke the awkward moment by falling through the roof.

History Guy · August 8, 2002, 10:16

"Oh...hi mates...I was just...eh...getting into a pod...lurched a bit...suppose it was that whiskey and soda...smashed through the titanium floor, fell right down here, stepping on Bootneck's head...OK, mate?" began Domai, spluttering, and spitting out some teeth.

Kassiopeia · August 8, 2002, 18:29

"Hey, cut the chit chat, I'm hurting here", Santiago screamed, lying limp on the floor.

Mr. President · August 10, 2002, 04:04

"Maybe I can help," Domai offered, "Bob got his hands cut off by a jigsaw in the engine core the other day and I picked them up for him."

History Guy · August 10, 2002, 11:53

Domai chuckled insanely, "Heck, you should have seen the old bugger, turning around from the jigsaw, his arms sticking up, blood (looking a bit like watery red paint) spurting out like water from a hose, oh man, you shoulda seen it, mates!"

Kassiopeia · August 12, 2002, 11:35

During this exchange, Santiago fell unconscious on the floor, blood gushing out of her body, giving a clear sign that she would perish if something wouldn't happen and fast.

Mr. President · August 12, 2002, 21:38

Domai and Bootneck were so busy arguing about whether or not he was a sick masochistic freak, they did not even notice that the cargo hold was no longer attached to the rest of the ship.

Gnool · August 14, 2002, 02:55

It was only when Domai was shoved backwards by Bootneck into the ever-expanding pool of Colonel Santiago's blood and slipped over that they noticed that they were hurtling towards Chiron at 500 km/h.

Kassiopeia · August 14, 2002, 09:30

"Oh no, not again", said the bowl of petunias.

Gnool · August 15, 2002, 02:07

While Domai's pod was busy screaming towards Planetsurface, Yang was having problems of his own.

Mr. President · August 15, 2002, 07:14

"Who would have thought a jetpack would be so damn hard to operate?" he grumbled, as the harness' buckle pinched his finger.

History Guy · August 15, 2002, 15:44

And so, at one minute, Yang struggled to remove his trapped pinky, Miriam and Pigtree claimed Planet as their own, Zakharov grew almost nine inches, Domai, Bootneck, and Santiago flapped about in the cargo hold, and Morgan and Lal watched the dancing girls, a big sperm whale suddenly splattered itself across the face of Chiron.

Gnool · August 16, 2002, 02:08

Miriam, wiping some sperm whale blubber off herself, said, "Where did that sperm whale come from?"