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View Poll Results: How do you rate this epic
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One of the best I have ever read
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14.29% |
Good, but not once of the classics
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57.14% |
Its okay, could be better
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28.57% |
It totally sucks, PLEASE DON'T WRITE ANYMORE
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April 22, 2002, 23:49
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#1
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King
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: The Hand of Sheep, the Hand of Death
Posts: 2,271
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The road to death
This story was played on a custom map, of the world, pf my own devising. I have since lost the file but have been able to give you this story, from the notes I took. This game was actually part of an International Relations experiement.
The specs were
I was the Germans
Emperor mode
Raging hordes
16 civs
Custom map (Very large map of world)
I start the story in the 13th century, which until then the world peaceful, only the ancient demise of the Iriquois (I hate them anyway) showed the only evidence of war.
I will be slow posting this up probably a chapter evry few days so I apologise If you find this tedious.
__________________
Don't tell a twisted person he is twisted, he may take offence. (THAT MEANS ME!)
Founder of the Mafia Poly Series (THATS RIGHT I STARTED IT)
Nesing, come and see what its about in the Stories and Diplomacy threads.
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April 23, 2002, 00:03
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#2
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King
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: The Hand of Sheep, the Hand of Death
Posts: 2,271
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THE BEGINNING - PROLOGUE TO THE STORY
I am the last man alive in this part of the world, perhaps the last in the entire world. I am writing a history of our road to destruction, so if anyone ever finds it they may not make the sam mistake. This is a history of a dead planet, a planet destroyed by the greed of its leaders. If only those leaders didn't think of themselves as so smart, smarter than the scientists, who gave them the warning.
Before the 13th century AD, the world of ours was a peaceful place. Only the ancient demise of the barbarious Iriqoius nation by the hands of the Aztects, showed any hint of war, and what would await all of us. The world traded freely, unimpeeded by Pirates or the small few areas that still layed unclaimed (mainly desert or artic). There was fabulous wines from Persia, Spices from the jungles of Zululand, and Silks of Egypt. Of course there was also the Iron of Germany. Ironic perhaps that the iron, much sought by all other nations, made that power the leader amongst the world, an contributed to their downfall.
However needless to say that the world war a peaceful paridise of lesure, beauty and mail-order brides. This was all to change, however when the first hint of the oncomming disatser. The discovery of Gunpowder was made in 1206 in German Nuremburg. The first cried of German triump led to horror as there was no 'saltpeter' to be found in the vast German Republic. However there was a large deposit to be found in England (one of 3 in the world) and was near the English city of Liverpool. Thus would begin the FIRST WORLD WAR (1216 -1310) - The Great war of Saltpeter
__________________
Don't tell a twisted person he is twisted, he may take offence. (THAT MEANS ME!)
Founder of the Mafia Poly Series (THATS RIGHT I STARTED IT)
Nesing, come and see what its about in the Stories and Diplomacy threads.
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April 23, 2002, 00:10
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#3
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King
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: The Hand of Sheep, the Hand of Death
Posts: 2,271
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Just a quick note so most of you all know where the civs were. This in words due to the lack of screenshots (God damn viruses)
England - British Isles and Scandinavia
France - France, Spain and North Africa
Rome - Italy Greece and Libya
Greece - Mid East and Egypt
Germany - Central and Eastern Eurpoe extending into Central Asia
Russia - North Asia
Persia - Far East Serbia and Alaska
India - India, Pakistan and Afganistan perhaps Tibet
Japan - Jpan, South East Asia, and coastline China
China - In between Japan, India, Russia and Germany
Zululand - The rest of Africa and Madagascar
USA - US (except for the deep south and California, and Canada
Aztects - Deep south US, Carrabean, ande Central America
Babaloyn - Argentina and Chilie
Egypt - The rest of South America
Unclaimed was Greenlan, Iceland all the islands in the Artic circle, parts of Nothern Russia, Australia, New Zealand and moszt of the Pacific Islands
__________________
Don't tell a twisted person he is twisted, he may take offence. (THAT MEANS ME!)
Founder of the Mafia Poly Series (THATS RIGHT I STARTED IT)
Nesing, come and see what its about in the Stories and Diplomacy threads.
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April 23, 2002, 00:50
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#4
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King
Local Time: 18:25
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Even if you don't believe in Jesus he believes in you!
Posts: 3,043
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Quote:
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Originally posted by: Sheep
world war, a peaceful paridise of lesure, beauty and mail-order brides.
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LOL, taking stuff out of context is funny, get Civman to give you the helpful link (he'll know when he reads this) It is why my stories are the funniest in apolyton.
Basic tips:
1. Don't stop writing EVER, you can only improve
2. Focus on character development as opposed to historical accounts, (i.e. show the heated diplomacy between Elizabeth and Bismarck just after the invention of gunpowder)
3. Read other stories, you may end up with a good idea or concept that you can use in your own story, JUST DON"T COPY STORIES
My two cents:
You have potential, keep writing stories, because I'll keep reading them. Some people are all about the detailed descriptions of locations etc. You can avoid most of those through interesting dialogue, however basic geographic locations should be mentioned, i.e. Rome to the west
__________________
First Master, Banan-Abbot of the Nana-stary, and Arch-Nan of the Order of the Sacred Banana.
Marathon, the reason my friends and I have been playing the same hotseat game since 2006...
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April 23, 2002, 02:30
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#5
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King
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: The Hand of Sheep, the Hand of Death
Posts: 2,271
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Thanks will keep your suggestions in mind when I write down the next chapter tonite - WORLD WAR ONE - THE GREAT WAR OF SALTPETER
PS Its going to be a little longer than the prologue
__________________
Don't tell a twisted person he is twisted, he may take offence. (THAT MEANS ME!)
Founder of the Mafia Poly Series (THATS RIGHT I STARTED IT)
Nesing, come and see what its about in the Stories and Diplomacy threads.
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April 23, 2002, 11:13
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#6
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Emperor
Local Time: 17:25
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: May 2001
Location: of the Martian Empire
Posts: 4,969
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__________________
Ham grass chocolate.
"This should be the question they ask you before you get to vote. If you answer 'no', then they brand you with a giant red 'I' on your forehead and you are forever barred from taking part in the electoral process again."--KrazyHorse
"I'm so very glad KH is Canadian."--Donegeal
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April 24, 2002, 01:09
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#7
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King
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: The Hand of Sheep, the Hand of Death
Posts: 2,271
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Sorry its taking me so long to post the next part of the story, just finnishing the final touches tonite, public holiday tommos, so It'l;l probably be up by then
__________________
Don't tell a twisted person he is twisted, he may take offence. (THAT MEANS ME!)
Founder of the Mafia Poly Series (THATS RIGHT I STARTED IT)
Nesing, come and see what its about in the Stories and Diplomacy threads.
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April 24, 2002, 01:12
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#8
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King
Local Time: 18:25
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Even if you don't believe in Jesus he believes in you!
Posts: 3,043
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No, the one what helped me
__________________
First Master, Banan-Abbot of the Nana-stary, and Arch-Nan of the Order of the Sacred Banana.
Marathon, the reason my friends and I have been playing the same hotseat game since 2006...
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April 24, 2002, 10:45
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#9
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Emperor
Local Time: 17:25
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: May 2001
Location: of the Martian Empire
Posts: 4,969
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that doesnt apply here...that's about broing straight narrative histories, and i dont think thats what this story is...
__________________
Ham grass chocolate.
"This should be the question they ask you before you get to vote. If you answer 'no', then they brand you with a giant red 'I' on your forehead and you are forever barred from taking part in the electoral process again."--KrazyHorse
"I'm so very glad KH is Canadian."--Donegeal
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April 25, 2002, 22:52
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#10
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King
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: The Hand of Sheep, the Hand of Death
Posts: 2,271
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THE FIRST WORLD WAR - THE GREAT WAR OF SALTPETER
part one
The intitial German cries of triumph, in 1206, turned to anguish when slatpeter was not discovered inside to glorious German Republic.....
1206
'WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT THERE IS NO 'SLATPETER' IN THE REICH!' the leader roared. Moments before an aide bold enough to defy Bismark had told him the bad news of German lack of saltpeter.
'There is some in England sir, near the township of Liverpool, we shan't have much trouble to capture this valuable resource' quivered the soon to be dead aide
'AND GO TO WAR WITH ENGLAND, I HEAR THEY ARE FRIENDLY WITH MOST OF THE KNOWN WORLD, IT WON'T BE LOOKED UPON KINDLY'
'Sir, we could send some money to the French, they would help us, other countries will have diffrent prices, France will be the greatest help though' stammered the aide
'OKAY FETCH ME THAT ***** ELIZABETH, I WANT TO SEE IF WE CAN GET THIS CITY PEACEFULLY FIRST'
later on (1207)
'What can I do for you infedel leader of the Germans' beamed the haughty Queen
'The German people desire peace but continued English expansion into German lands, require that a price be paid to continue with that peace' Bismark told. He had stayed up memorizing that first expression. It is now squarely on England's shoulders if war should and when it will start.
'And what payment would this be?' laughed the ugly Queen!
'I will not raze your pathetic and insolent civilization if you pay the German coffers 250 gold and give the townships of Liverpool, and Birningham the German citizenship that so many want' Bismark looked proud not only had he said what he needed to, but had upset his rival too.
'Be careful Bismark, I have powerful friends, no English leader will standby whilst her nation is dishonoured in such a way.'
'If you shall not pay there will be war' warned the German
'I'll save you the trouble then, The Kingdom of England formally declares war on the Republic of Germany, good day' Elizabeth stormed out in a huff, whilst Bismark chuckeled, hios ruse had worked. Although the war would still occur, it would be England shown as the aggressor, not Germany. The foreign minister would be happy, perhaps more happier than the defence minister, who had been itching for a war. It was time for some fun
__________________
Don't tell a twisted person he is twisted, he may take offence. (THAT MEANS ME!)
Founder of the Mafia Poly Series (THATS RIGHT I STARTED IT)
Nesing, come and see what its about in the Stories and Diplomacy threads.
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April 26, 2002, 15:33
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#11
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Emperor
Local Time: 17:25
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: May 2001
Location: of the Martian Empire
Posts: 4,969
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not bad
PS: nice sig
__________________
Ham grass chocolate.
"This should be the question they ask you before you get to vote. If you answer 'no', then they brand you with a giant red 'I' on your forehead and you are forever barred from taking part in the electoral process again."--KrazyHorse
"I'm so very glad KH is Canadian."--Donegeal
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May 4, 2002, 23:48
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#12
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King
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: The Hand of Sheep, the Hand of Death
Posts: 2,271
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WORLD WAR ONE - THE GREAT WAR OF SALTPETER
part two
The Anglo-German border
The frontier between Germany and England in Scandinavia become the first battlefield as the valliant Teutonic knights sallioed out after the babariac English legions. The English were paying dearly for their independence, a cost that grew dearer with every strike of the sword and every shot of the catapults. The German people would not be denied the Empire they deserved and the defence it needed. Saltpeter would be German.
Meanwhile back in Berlin
Bismark was angry. 'What do you mean the Russians have sided with the English agaisnt the alliance'. He had successfully managed to make an alliance of the local poweres through the bribery of German Iron and the promise of gold. Rome, Greece, and France all had joined him in his crusade. Zululand had been defiant and invaded Roman possesions in Africa, providing the second enemy and India was embroiled with a costly war with Greece. Even Egypt had seen the need to join the winning side and had invaded Zululand from accross the Atlantic. Russia had been distant pledging neutrality, neutrality that no longer seemed to be of any value.
'The Russians have allied with the English and their allies ahve also sided with them' The foreign minister, Civman, muttered
'What the Japs, damn those infernal pagans'
'Not only that but Persia as well' The defence minister, Metaliturtle, added
'All the Persians are good for are furs, no need to worry about them' Bismark boomed
'we could draw China into the war not only they would prevent the Japs of being any nuicance to us but also stop them from aiding India.' Civman suggested
'What about the United States, they are after all the second most powerful nation on earth after us my lord' Metaliturtle said.
'Get me that bastard Lincoln now, it looks as tho we may need him after all!'
In Nuremburg
Lincoln had slept well affter the sea voyage from America, the German Chancellor had summoned him, and Lincoln was willing to hear. When war raged on, you couldn't afford to be left behind too much.
'So pleased to meet you Lincoln' Bismark greeted the American with a warm handshake, after all he was leader of one of the only few nations that could give his serious grief.
'Please call me Abe' Lincoln responded, he sized up the Chancellor, so Bismark wants something'
'Okay Abe, call me Otto, now getting down to buisness shall we, How would you like an alliance against Japan and Persia wih us'
'Make it worth our while, Otto, and I will consider it.'
'Perhaps the secret of Gunpowder and the promise of shipments of slatpeter and iron for next 20 turns, may make you consider it'
Abraham Lincoln almost yelped in delight. Not only would he receive the iron he needed to continue American growth but he would receive a new technology and some of this 'saltpeter'
'What does Gunpowder do' Abe asked
'Explosions my friend big expolsions, ever wanted to explode that ***** Elizabeth'
'Why know that I think about it'
'Okay I leave it to you'
__________________
Don't tell a twisted person he is twisted, he may take offence. (THAT MEANS ME!)
Founder of the Mafia Poly Series (THATS RIGHT I STARTED IT)
Nesing, come and see what its about in the Stories and Diplomacy threads.
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May 4, 2002, 23:49
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#13
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King
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: The Hand of Sheep, the Hand of Death
Posts: 2,271
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There will be more in the near future, sorry for the delay but I have been pre-occupied with other problems, work and assignments and has prevented me using the computer for anything really important. ENJOY
__________________
Don't tell a twisted person he is twisted, he may take offence. (THAT MEANS ME!)
Founder of the Mafia Poly Series (THATS RIGHT I STARTED IT)
Nesing, come and see what its about in the Stories and Diplomacy threads.
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May 9, 2002, 20:54
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#14
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King
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: The Hand of Sheep, the Hand of Death
Posts: 2,271
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BTW The sig of mine is my life philosphy, essentially it means live every day like it was your last!
__________________
Don't tell a twisted person he is twisted, he may take offence. (THAT MEANS ME!)
Founder of the Mafia Poly Series (THATS RIGHT I STARTED IT)
Nesing, come and see what its about in the Stories and Diplomacy threads.
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May 9, 2002, 21:18
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#15
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King
Local Time: 09:25
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: The Hand of Sheep, the Hand of Death
Posts: 2,271
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THE FIRST WORLD WAR - THE GREAT WAR OF SALTPETER
part three
1300 ad
The German Chancellor Otto von Bismark, was deligted in the news of the capture of the English monarch. 'Now we can execute that ugly *****' he exlaimed. Not only was England all but subdued, all but one of their island cities fallind to the Germans, the other to the French. But also the greater war that had started had indeed gone well.
A messenger ran in ' The Russians have sued for peace sir'
Bismark sat down 'The war is over then, only Japan continues to resist against the combined might of China and America, they will not hold out for long,' At last after almost a century of conflict the Greater German Reich was at peace. The hated English were now German citizens, except for the Brighton which was now French, and the four cites of Western Russia were also now bowing to the Chancellor instead of the Tsarina, in Moscow.
'Bring me that Elizabeth now, I want to tell her the 'good news' before we execute her next week'
Later on
'What do you want you old bastard' Elizabeth exclaimed upon seeing the German ruler upon his throne.
'I wished to inform you of 3 things my dear ugly Queen'
'And What are they, you pompous *****'
'Firstly I would like to inform you that the entirety of England is now under allied hands, as you know Brighton is of French citizenship now, the rest of your pitiful empire is under German dominion.
'Yes, I kne that already, You won, we lost, no need to rub it in' Elizabeth retorted
'But you don't know this, my dear Elizabeth, The Russians yesterday sued for peace at the city of Kiev, The cease fire is now in effect and the German Reich is now at once at peace, once more'. Elizatbeth's eyes widened, Russia was her only ally, that was of some use to her doomed nation, if they to had surrendered, their failure, would only streghten the hated German- French alliance.
' Latsly I wish to inform you that the German court of War Crimes has forund you guilty of three charges. They include excessive ugliness, in particular regards to you lack of cleansiness, your stink, and you really bad teeth. The provision of treason against the German Reich, which is the rightful ruler of all the British Isles, apart from the French city of Brighton, and resistance against Germany causing the death of German troops. The sentence is death after torture to be carried out this time next week, by the high German executioner, in the fair city of Berlin. In attendence will be the heads of state of all nations, except for Persia, which has ceased to exisit as your own did, and Japan which still continues the struggle against our allies Chian and the United States'.
Elizabeth shook with fear, she had expected to continue to live out her life as a exile once released by the German Werchmact, now she new her fate.
Bismark's laughter could be heard well into the night
__________________
Don't tell a twisted person he is twisted, he may take offence. (THAT MEANS ME!)
Founder of the Mafia Poly Series (THATS RIGHT I STARTED IT)
Nesing, come and see what its about in the Stories and Diplomacy threads.
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May 9, 2002, 22:56
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#16
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King
Local Time: 18:25
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Even if you don't believe in Jesus he believes in you!
Posts: 3,043
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good continuation, maybe spell check, and separate dialogue, but otherwise GREAT
__________________
First Master, Banan-Abbot of the Nana-stary, and Arch-Nan of the Order of the Sacred Banana.
Marathon, the reason my friends and I have been playing the same hotseat game since 2006...
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May 16, 2002, 18:31
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#17
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Emperor
Local Time: 17:25
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: May 2001
Location: of the Martian Empire
Posts: 4,969
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bump
__________________
Ham grass chocolate.
"This should be the question they ask you before you get to vote. If you answer 'no', then they brand you with a giant red 'I' on your forehead and you are forever barred from taking part in the electoral process again."--KrazyHorse
"I'm so very glad KH is Canadian."--Donegeal
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