April 25, 2002, 16:47
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#31
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Emperor
Local Time: 01:32
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: Copenful Wonderhagen
Posts: 4,490
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I was talking to a couple socialists about our options on May 1 and I actually said the magic words "What date is May 1 this year, anyway?"
Of course, it was obvious that I meant which day of the week. But it remained embarrasing as hell. It's on Wednesday, by the way.
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April 25, 2002, 16:49
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#32
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President of the OT
Local Time: 17:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Nov 1999
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 40,843
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I tend to forget most stupid things people say because there's no point in remembering it, but I do remember a couple years ago a Fox TV special on something, where the announcer proclaimed: "And it explodes into a FIREBALL of FLAMES!". 
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"I'll never doubt you again when it comes to hockey, [Prince] Asher." - Guynemer
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April 25, 2002, 18:15
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#33
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Local Time: 18:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: ACK!! PPHHHHTTBBBTTTT!!!
Posts: 7,022
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"It was in the last place I looked."
"Take some meat out of the freezer to unthaw."
"Would you like a hot apple pie?"......"Did I ask for a ****ing hot apple pie?"
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"I think Bigfoot is blurry, that's the problem. It's not the photographer's fault. Bigfoot is blurry, and that's extra scary to me. There's a large out of focus monster roaming the countryside. Look out, he's fuzzy, let's get out of here."
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April 25, 2002, 18:59
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#34
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Warlord
Local Time: 17:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Dec 2001
Posts: 141
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In 7th grade, we were trying to put the play Much Ado About Nothing in a 1940's setting in drama class. Someone asked, "Who won World War II?" I said, "Why don't you go to Nazi headquarters and find out?"
Oh, and the other day, I was trying to find a perfume by Estee Lauder for my grandmother's birthday or something, and I was telling my mom they didn't have the specific one she was looking for, but they did have Institution.
She promptly told me that was Intuition, then proceeded to laugh for five minutes.
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April 25, 2002, 20:16
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#35
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Warlord
Local Time: 18:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Drinking the blood of the Proletariat
Posts: 200
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One of my pet peeves is when some idiot says "It looks like a war zone"/"...like a nuclear bomb hit it"
Some idiot on TV said that the Mississippi flood was "like a warzone."  A war with what? Supersoakers?
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A proud citizen of the only convicted terrorist harboring nation!
.13 posts per day, and proud of it!
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April 25, 2002, 20:21
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#36
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Chieftain
Local Time: 16:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Keep on spinning those lies away
Posts: 58
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Bill Gates
How bout " 640K is enough for anyone." -Bill Gates
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"People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid."
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
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April 25, 2002, 20:43
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#37
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President of the OT
Local Time: 17:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Nov 1999
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 40,843
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Re: Bill Gates
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Il Duce
How bout " 640K is enough for anyone." -Bill Gates
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And it was, at the time. 
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"I'll never doubt you again when it comes to hockey, [Prince] Asher." - Guynemer
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April 25, 2002, 21:17
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#38
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King
Local Time: 09:32
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: of my princess Anastasia!
Posts: 2,102
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Anything stated to be more than 100% when referring to performance e.g dumb footballers saying "i gave 200% out there today!" D'UH!!!
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April 25, 2002, 21:20
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#39
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Deity
Local Time: 19:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: May 2001
Location: 138% of your RDA of Irony
Posts: 18,577
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"Geodesics? I love Earth Sciences"
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April 25, 2002, 21:27
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#40
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Emperor
Local Time: 19:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: Philadelphia
Posts: 9,706
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Lung:
200% of what they did the previous game (ie- twice as much effort) maybe?
and damn Monk... don't remind me I was born on the communist holiday...
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April 25, 2002, 21:29
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#41
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Emperor
Local Time: 18:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: It doesn't matter what your name is!
Posts: 3,601
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Quote:
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The rich got richer and the poor got richer during Reagan's administration.
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__________________
"Chegitz, still angry about the fall of the Soviet Union in 1991?
You provide no source. You PROVIDE NOTHING! And yet you want to destroy capitalism.. you criminal..." - Fez
"I was hoping for a Communist utopia that would last forever." - Imran Siddiqui
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April 25, 2002, 21:32
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#42
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Emperor
Local Time: 18:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: May 2001
Location: flying too low to the ground
Posts: 4,625
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Lung
Anything stated to be more than 100% when referring to performance e.g dumb footballers saying "i gave 200% out there today!" D'UH!!!
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i really like when football players thank jesus/god for their games.
"i'd like to 'tank' jesus christ, and the father almighty, for giving me the power to hit that guy really, really hard, dislocating his shoulder, fracturing several ribs, and breaking his leg. jesus was out there with me"
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"I've lived too long with pain. I won't know who I am without it. We have to leave this place, I am almost happy here."
- Ender, from Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card
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April 25, 2002, 21:33
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#43
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Chieftain
Local Time: 23:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: Tau Ceti
Posts: 62
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A girl who went to CCD, and was from a family of practicing Christians, was in a class on the history of the world. We were discussing the breakup of the islamic caliphates following the assasination of muhammed's grankids, and she said, "Oh my God! That's like the romans killing jesus!"
We stared, and at once said, "I think they did."
She also once asked what prostittues did in victorian times, to whch the teacher replied their hardworking tradition.
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April 25, 2002, 21:38
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#44
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Local Time: 18:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: ACK!! PPHHHHTTBBBTTTT!!!
Posts: 7,022
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Quote:
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Originally posted by UberKruX
i really like when football players thank jesus/god for their games.
"i'd like to 'tank' jesus christ, and the father almighty, for giving me the power to hit that guy really, really hard, dislocating his shoulder, fracturing several ribs, and breaking his leg. jesus was out there with me"
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Funny how you never hear them say this.
"I played a good game. I really thought we would win.........UNTIL JESUS MADE ME FUMBLE!"
__________________
"I think Bigfoot is blurry, that's the problem. It's not the photographer's fault. Bigfoot is blurry, and that's extra scary to me. There's a large out of focus monster roaming the countryside. Look out, he's fuzzy, let's get out of here."
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April 25, 2002, 21:42
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#45
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Deity
Local Time: 19:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: May 2001
Location: 138% of your RDA of Irony
Posts: 18,577
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Quote:
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Originally posted by UberKruX
i really like when football players thank jesus/god for their games.
"i'd like to 'tank' jesus christ, and the father almighty, for giving me the power to hit that guy really, really hard, dislocating his shoulder, fracturing several ribs, and breaking his leg. jesus was out there with me"
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You're right. Jesus wouldn't settle for mere injuries; with him it's a fatality every time.
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April 25, 2002, 22:01
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#46
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Settler
Local Time: 18:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Battle Creek, Michigan
Posts: 23
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From The People Unclear On The Concept File.
One of my brothers has a floppy based PC (no HD). After reading the Users Manual he Formated his Systems Disk because "The manual said to Format all disks before using them".
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The ways of Man are passing strange, he buys his freedom and he counts his change.
Then he lets the wind his days arrange and he calls the tide his master.
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April 25, 2002, 22:09
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#47
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Deity
Local Time: 09:32
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: In a tunnel under the DMZ
Posts: 12,273
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"I didn't inhale" would have to be up there.
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April 25, 2002, 22:15
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#48
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Warlord
Local Time: 18:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Toronto, Canada - AECCP member
Posts: 192
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Recently, I was listening in school to a strongly environmentalist speaker talking about why she supported the environment and so forth. It was then question period - the level of questions was generally pretty high. Then this one guy comes up and says:
"The way I see it, we're all just atoms, and it's not like the atoms are going to escape the earth, so why do we have to worry about the environment?"
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I refute it thus!
"Destiny! Destiny! No escaping that for me!"
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April 25, 2002, 22:31
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#49
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Deity
Local Time: 19:32
Local Date: October 31, 2010
Join Date: May 2001
Location: 138% of your RDA of Irony
Posts: 18,577
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April 25, 2002, 22:34
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#50
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King
Local Time: 09:32
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: of my princess Anastasia!
Posts: 2,102
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Albert Speer
Lung:
200% of what they did the previous game (ie- twice as much effort) maybe?
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Wishful thinking 
It started out with statements like "I want you guys to give 110 percent out there today!", upon which the ante has been forever increased to "Joey's a legend! He gave, ohh, 150% out there today. The man's a freak!" To give 150% performance, he must be 
I did hear recently such amazing figures as 1000% uttered by a mathematically challenged footballer
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April 25, 2002, 22:36
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#51
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King
Local Time: 09:32
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: of my princess Anastasia!
Posts: 2,102
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I once heard my mother say "Oh, i better turn off the lights or i'll flatten the tyres!!!"  I knew what she meant, but it's funny all the same
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April 26, 2002, 02:48
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#52
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Prince
Local Time: 00:32
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Augusta Vindelicorum
Posts: 655
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Some different sort of stupid.
The mother of my godmother died. A few months later I went to my grandmother washing clothes (which I did do regulary because it was more fun than a public laundry). She incidentally asked me: "Did you phone Anne recently?" I replied in a rather sloppy way "No, father in ruins, too?" My grandmother stared at me and said "I cannot lie to you, and it was you who asked. She told me not to talk about it. Yes, he died."
The most funny things I usually hear in the radio (keeping me laughing for the next half an hour). A completely mispronounced word in a programme which is aimed a the more culturally oriented audience (lots of classical music etc). Or the rather popular word "Atomgegner", those who oppose atoms ....
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Why doing it the easy way if it is possible to do it complicated?
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April 26, 2002, 02:50
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#53
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King
Local Time: 02:32
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: the contradiction is filled with holes...
Posts: 1,398
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"You can get cancer from potato chips" - Swedish scientists
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I'm not a complete idiot: some parts are still missing.
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