Bad Neighbors II the Unification of a Destroyed Empire

Metaliturtle · June 2, 2002, 17:35

I'm writing this with the idea that the Greek Empire fell into disunion after they conquered the world, new civilizations arose, and with them came new leadership. Many (including myself) have been wondering if this would be an epic, or a comedy. To end the suspense, I have decided...Bad Neighbors 2 will be an Epic. That DOES NOT however, mean that I can't put funny parts in it, after all, every great shakespearian play had comic relief, and they seemed to do more or less well.

So without further ado, here's the teaser for Bad Neighbors II.
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Paulos was standing in Athens, in front of the Ancient Grecian Palace. An old man, he remembered the day Helena's body had been carried from there. She had been the Unifying factor of this great nation, but now it was so widespread, he didn't know how it could survive much longer. He was saddened by this, he was the only living Greek to have fought on all three Islands, and he hated to think that his efforts would have been in vain. A solitary tear rolled slowly down his otherwise expressionless facade.
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Bismarck knew what he had to do now, he had to revive Roman nationalism, but he knew that he couldn't call it Rome. Greek cultural corrections officers had come in, changed the names of the cities, and employed hopelites to the guard. He needed a catchy new name for his new nation, and it had to be good. Germany! that was it! Now he was ready for the reunification of a land.
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Sitting Bull hated the Grecian influence on his land, this had been Aztecan longer than Greece had even existed. It was outrageous how easy his people were conquered, and that fact alone made him ready to pop. What he felt he needed was a new ceremony and a new tribal name to bring forth a unified Aztecan Continent, he started to dance for his ancestors, Grecians simply called it, the Ghost Dance. Iroqois culture had been born.

Metaliturtle · June 2, 2002, 21:00

well, what do you guys think? Do it have potential??

High Lord J · June 2, 2002, 21:30

This story would not have poteintal if anyone else was writing it. You have always written much weaker beginings from ends from what I read so far so keep trying you should end up just fine.

civman2000 · June 2, 2002, 21:53

a bit disconnected, but if it's like Bad neighbors I with more plot and a bit less humor

Metaliturtle · June 2, 2002, 22:04

I just wanted to put down some background

Metaliturtle · June 3, 2002, 22:54

I used something that I haven't used before in a story, a letter format, it may be good, it may be bad, tell me if it works please.
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Sitting Bull was the first dissident to strike, the wars with the Grecians were fresh in the minds of most of the people, and now his new Iroquois nation would become a reality with the aid of modern Grecian weapons.

"Bring me my GR-38"

"Why sir?"

"The people will not be able to stand my rule if it is attained through cowardice and sneakiness, I will be leading the forward infantry battalion."

"Very noble sir, it is an honor to be your messenger"

"Oh, prepare to e-mail this letter to the Grecian Congress upon our attack."

To the diabolical scum which call themselves Grecians,

As you are reading this, be advised that Your control over Azteca is no more, the mighty nation of Iroquois has been founded, and will not settle until the Grecians recognize the Iroquois as a fully independent nation, and as such a nation, are permitted the rights of self-government, self-protection, and independence in all forms of the word.
Although we have been forced to destroy your armies here on the Aztecan Continent, your citizens will be given the option to return to Greece, free of charge.
Any attempt to send reinforcements on your part will be futile in about 23 seconds, and we both know it takes days to get troops here with no air bases.
Oh, and guess what, We now control your Luxury Resources of Gems and Furs, so to mock you, we will have every 12th bullet be diamond tipped for the quick termination of any Grecian insects who feel that they can take our established place.

The official stance of:
Sitting Bull, and the Iroquois
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Greece's parliament was in distress, they had not been able to elect someone capable of the task at hand, as none were granted immortality by God. The great leaders Helena and Alexander lost theirs when they were no longer fit to rule, did that mean that no Grecian was fit to rule Greece?

"I still say sir that Markos would be a much finer ruler than you!"

"Why sir? Can't you at least tell me that?"

"Certainly!! First off, in light of the recent mailing from Sitting Bull, we have a revolt in the colonies, Markos is the only candidate who has even been a member of the military in a wartime situation. Secondly, nobody has EVER thought that he had a scandalous participation in an orgy inside of wedlock, and lastly, He was born in GREECE!!!"

"I will not stand for this assault upon my character in this public forum!! If you wish to spread lies, you may spread them in your own house on your own time!!!"

Nobody even looked up to see the grizzled old man enter the parliamentary hall, and they certainly didn't hear him clear his throat, but when he finally spoke into a nearby microphone, everybody froze stiff. His voice didn't match his character, in fact, the more he talked, the more powerful his voice became, and the less grizzled he looked.

"I am Paulos, a Grecian citizen of Greco-Franco decent, last night I was saddened, as I felt the very fabric which makes this empire great, rip into three distinct parts. I fear that this Iroquois threat is the beginning, not the end of the fall of our empire should we stay this course. Some of you are too young to remember, but I fought victorious wars on all three continents of this world, and am more than capable now of reunification. Elect me an--"

He was stopped by a bolt of lightning, Zeus had made it split, killing the two candidates for the Grecian executive position.

Paulos continued, "AND, Zeus, in his almighty wisdom, slew my competition, which means I have the mandate of the gods, failure to elect me now, will result in a destruction of all that makes Greece excellent."
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Bismarck was pleased, he had not counted on an Iroquois uprising, and the squabbling Grecian government left roman cities and citizens with a strong distaste for their position.

"Bring me a Messenger!"

A messenger hurried in
"Ye-Yes sir!"

"Send this note to this "Sitting Bull" I've been seeing on the news"

"Yes sir"

"This nation will be mine soon enough, and then we conquer... MAINLAND GREECE!!!"

The letter read as follows

To the Mighty and Brave Sitting Bull,

Your cunning and bravery in ridding your lands of our mutual enemies, the Grecians, makes you honorable in my opinion. To help get the people to both our sides, I offer you spices and wines in exchange for furs and Gems. I also offer an alliance against the Greecians and a mutual protection pact, lest one of us get a deal too sweet to pass up.

Your co-patriot
Bismarck.

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That's it for now, because this is a lot of writing for me, more tomorrow!!

Metaliturtle · June 3, 2002, 22:55

Crap, I forgot the German rebellion, oh well, another long post tomorrow I guess.

civman2000 · June 4, 2002, 08:45

! Didn't seem like your normal style, but more like cbraund's or OzWolf's

!

Metaliturtle · June 4, 2002, 09:13

That's cuz I don't like being funny all the time, I need to work on something serious so that I can refresh my..funnybank.. if you will...

Metaliturtle · June 6, 2002, 20:01

I just came up with an interesting idea, I hope y'all enjoy, I WILL
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Paulos had caused an uproar in the Grecian Parliament. Could he be effective? He was extremely old, how did they know he wasn't just senile? He could just cause an embarrasing mark upon Grecian History, but if he's right, those bolts of lightning were really cool...

"Paulos is just insane, nobody has been given the mandate of Zeus since Alexander passed his on to Helena!!! That lightning was because Zeus didn't want our candidates, that doesn't mean he wants Paulos!!!"

"But what if he did want Paulos, Lightning isn't really all too stoppable yet, especially with the usurpers' metalic armor, if he led the way he could destroy our enemies."

"Zeus is not allowed to be involved with changing the outcome of war, we'll win whether or not Paulos leads, I say we eliminate him quickly."

After much more debate along these same lines, it was decided he would be put in the Paris Asylum until more solid evidence for his control of Greece could be found. In the meantime, they elected the new head of the military, Cho Ko Phu, of the disciplined Isle of Japan where the people were still loyal to Greece.

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In Paris, Paulos wasted no time, he knew there was deeply buried hatred here for the Greeks, as this was the only French city left standing after the unification war.

He whispered to his cellmate in French, "France can be born anew as a powerful nation once more."

"zat's crazy, we will be murdered for thinking zat"

"No it is not, I have the mandate of Zeus"

Paulos went into a trancelike state. He started shaking, beginning in his fingertips, but spreading throughout while growing in intensity, he was soon having a powerful siezure on the floor.

His cellmate called the guard
"Guard! Guard! He's wiggin' out!!!"

The guard grabbed the bars and pressed his face against them to get a better look.

BAM ZZZZZZZZAP!! Lightning had struck the bar, the guard was instantly electricuted, because he had grabbed the bars and put his head against it, the electricity killed his cardiovascular and nervous systems instantaneously. Strangely, he was stuck holding the bars, which made the keys easy to grab. Paulos's cellmate released him and the others, and they all escaped to secret Tours, where the Phoenix party was formed.

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The Greek army was fighting worse than usual, reports came back to parliament that 7 divisions of cavalry were killed at the hands of an Iroquois warrior, things were beginning to look bleak.

"We need Paulos!!!"

"Will he even join us now that he's formed his own party bent on reviving France?"

"Yes, he's half Greek."

"He's also half French you idiot!! We're lucky if he doesn't die first anyway!!"

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What do you think, will Paulos gain control of Greece by Grecian request, or by French Conquest??
Any other comments would be pretty cool as well.

civman2000 · June 6, 2002, 22:42

Both. He makes deals with both and then gains bothe lands from another country (basic plot of Shadow of the Hegemon by Orson Scott Card)

Metaliturtle · June 6, 2002, 23:32

nah, I'm not gonna majorly rip off another author's plot

Metaliturtle · June 7, 2002, 13:08

Greek or French Empire??

johncmcleod · June 7, 2002, 22:00

Well, though I have weird tastes, if I was writing this story I'd have him convince both sides to unite together. If he chose conquest, the nation would be weak afterwards, for they had killed many of each other. If they peacefully united, the country would be strong afterwards. Great work on the story so far. I think it'll be a good one.