Best game one-liners? - Page 4

Frozzy · October 1, 2002, 03:07

"The Sun shines like a ruble in the sky"
"Yes, 10 of these would buy me a furry hat"

Joe and Abner, Hole 14, Sim Golf.

Andemagne · October 1, 2002, 18:30

Quote:

Originally posted by Mr. President
I know.....
...but I think we could be enlightened by some [i]Magic: the Gathering

can you remember the quote on "eyes of the martyr"?
I have never played the game, but have seen that card and its quote was... erm... touching.

MattyBoy · October 1, 2002, 18:30

Love this thread.
Keep em coming, folks.

Mr. President · October 1, 2002, 23:25

Are you sure that's what it's called, Andemagne? I can't find any references to a card with that name.

loinburger · October 2, 2002, 00:06

"Cabrini gropes for trout in strange rivers."
-Merchant Prince

"The Pope is 'ill'..."
-ibid

loinburger · October 2, 2002, 00:11

Quote:

Originally posted by Mr. President
Are you sure that's what it's called, Andemagne? I can't find any references to a card with that name.

From "Blood of the Martyr" (the picture is a close-up of somebody crying blood, so I can see where Andemagne got "Eyes of the Martyr"):

The willow knows what the storm does not: that the power to endure harm outlives the power to inflict it.

Mr. President · October 2, 2002, 03:48

Ah, that's it! Thanks, loinburger.

Here's a few Seventh Edition gems (I took them from the card catalog on the Wizards website since, as my signature suggests, I can't get it in Australia):

Duress:

"Change your mind, or I'll change it for you."

Opportunity:

Little things like morals shouldn't hinder one's ambition. -- Pirate creed

Arcane Laboratory:

Too many wizards spoil the spell, but too many spells spoil the wizard. -- Sign on entry to arcane lab

Phyrexian Hulk:

It doesn't think. It doesn't feel.
It doesn't laugh or cry.
All it does from dusk till dawn
Is make the soldiers die.
-- Onean children's rhyme

Sacred Nectar:

"For he on honeydew hath fed,
And drunk the milk of Paradise."
-- Samuel Taylor Coleridge, "Kubla Khan"

I tossed that last one in because it also appears in Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri.

loinburger · October 2, 2002, 20:06

"Providence is always on the side of the big battalions."
-Scorched Earth (quote from Sevigne)

"I don't suppose we could teach them to throw the cursed things?"
-Text from Goblin Grenade

FlameFlash · October 2, 2002, 20:20

Good ol' Goblin Grenades...

MosesPresley · October 2, 2002, 23:50

"The Kow Loon (?) doesn't understand the nature of the beast." from Homeworld: Cataclysm. The beast was an intelligent virus.

MattyBoy · October 3, 2002, 18:54

This is a finance quote, not from a game, but...

Quote:

When elephants are fighting, the ants die first

Andemagne · October 3, 2002, 19:32

Quote:

Originally posted by loinburger
From "Blood of the Martyr" (the picture is a close-up of somebody crying blood, so I can see where Andemagne got "Eyes of the Martyr"):

The willow knows what the storm does not: that the power to endure harm outlives the power to inflict it.

thanks, this is it I was looking for.

maybe I should add it to my sig.

MattyBoy · October 3, 2002, 21:33

You hear Neiman and Marcus arguing!
You hear the quarterback calling a play
(Nethack, while hallucinating)

MattyBoy · October 8, 2002, 00:42

You kill the Y2K bug!
(Nethack, while hallucinating)

You hear the wailing of the Banshee!
(Nethack, down to one hit point)

Zero-Tau · October 8, 2002, 15:35

The Godzilla misses the mother-in-law.
(Nethack, while hallucinating)

Mr. President · October 13, 2002, 18:55

"Okay. We'll disband for good."
-- Team Rocket Executive in Pokemon Gold

I love how agreeable Team Rocket is. All it takes to break them up is one kid with a couple of trained monsters.

St Leo · October 14, 2002, 02:03

"I like Pokemon." - Mr. President

Mr. President · October 14, 2002, 18:51

Wow, I was in a game without even realizing it!

FlameFlash · October 14, 2002, 20:40

Ah... the game of life...

loinburger · October 15, 2002, 09:16

"You don't know how to write that! You write 'Woot was here' and the scroll disappears."

-Nethack, when trying to write a scroll that you've never seen.

FlameFlash · October 15, 2002, 09:26

"Food went that way..." Me *pointing.*
"Food? FOOD!" Ogre *making crashing sounds as he runs outside...*
*around laughter* "2 experiance points for cleaverness... you didn't kill it!" GM "And now he's just running around the building..."
"FOOD!" Ogre *seeing another player who'd been walking nonchalantly along to search a different building.*
"Oh crap..." Other player.
Me and GM *evil laughter*

--Role-playing with some friends last Thursday... (hey, it's a game... with a combo of one-liners...)

Ari Rahikkala · October 15, 2002, 09:31

"Core dumped" - NetHack, after eating an apple or a pear.
"Segmentation fault -- core dumped" - NetHack, after eating an apple or a pear when hallucinating.
"Mmm... milk!" - UnReal World, after trying to milk a bull and drinking the result...

MattyBoy · October 15, 2002, 16:32

Quote:

"Core dumped" - NetHack, after eating an apple or a pear.

Yes that was very good as it looked exactly as if the UNIX process had core dumped.

I don't remember seeing that in more recent versions.
I wonder whether it had been removed.

I also love the way nethack allows you to continue receiving your emails while you are inside the game to make the experience a little more immersive.

Maquiladora · October 21, 2002, 02:33

I cant believe no one mentioned Sam & Max

Quote:

Well, it all started the day before today. I remember it just like
it was yesterday.
============
Sam: I'm thinking of a number from one to ten, and I don't know why.
Max: Me too!
============
Sam: Hey, a talking cat!
Cat: Look, a stupid dog. You must be the freelance police
Sam: Yes well, don't go blabbing it to everybody.
============
Sam: Your head is oddly disproportionate to the rest of your body.
Cat: It's the vocal cords, you'd be surprised how much room they take up.
============
Sam: Well you're looking hale and hearty little buddy.
Max: I'm a coffee achiever Sam!
============
Sam: My little buddy here needs to use the facilities.
Max: Facilities be damned! I need a bathroom!
============
Sam: Where should I put this thing so that it doesn't hurt anyone we know
or care about?
Max:Out the window, Sam. There's nobody but strangers out there.
============
MAX: I have to use the ghastly-smelling restroom!
SAM: Here -- use these special tongs for anything you have to handle.
MAX: ANYTHING?
...
SAM: How was it, little buddy?
MAX: It was dark, like a cave, and there were no toilets -- just black,
smoking holes in the walls and floor! Giant roaches howled like damned
souls as they skittered along the moldering grout-work!
SAM: Did you wash your fluffy paws?
============
Sam: Lets stop someplace and take a rest. A little to the left Max.
There's another weird lizard farm coming up fast at eleven o'clock.
Max: I feel the warmth of it's presence Sam.
============
PIRATE: We're going to bury you with our extra stash!
MAX: BURIED ALIVE? I'm alarmed!
PIRATE: We're going to shoot you first.
MAX: Oh, thank God.
============
MAX: I don't like his filed teeth and his watery, yellow eyeballs!
SAM: You can't even see his face from here!
MAX: I don't like his belligerent elbows, his threatening ear-backs!

Not really one liners, but easily the funniest game i ever played.

MattyBoy · November 26, 2002, 01:53

Nethack:
Fumbling keys, I accidentally tried to "apply" my "lock pick" to my cat, Morris:

Quote:

I don't think Morris would appreciate that.

FlameFlash · November 26, 2002, 10:27

Now that's priceless.

mrboo123 · November 29, 2002, 09:44

Quote:

Originally posted by CapitanGarlic
I forget which hockey game this is from, but:

Announcer 1: That was incredible!
Announcer 2: Then don't eat it...
Announcer 1: I said INCREDIBLE!

Its NHL 2002

Mr. President · November 30, 2002, 19:34

"D'you want axe?"
-- Troll Berserker in WarCraft II

Thrawn05 · November 30, 2002, 20:28

Quote:

Originally posted by Maquiladora
I cant believe no one mentioned Sam & Max

SAM: You know I never always wanted to be a cop.
MAX: Me neither, I wanted to be a Hun.

For those who played Morrowind, you should of noticed the number of naked Nords out there... well there's another in Tribunal!

Quote:

Forstaag the Sweltering
What're you looking at? No, I'm not paralyzed. And I've never even met a witch, much less been asked to escort one anywhere. Why am I naked? Because it's too damned hot here! You people think that every time you see a naked Nord barbarian, he's been tricked by some witch. So narrow minded. Now leave me alone.

Mr. President · December 1, 2002, 04:04

"Welcome to the Dark Ages."
-- Defeat message for final level of Roman campaign in Age of Empires: Rise of Rome