Hilarious AI Quotes - Page 2

mrmitchell · November 14, 2002, 08:16

He's high on something, Tatilla

Really, however, I haven't, because I'm always playing him.

"We see that your...um...'scientists' have not discovered [tech]."
"You can kiss my royal..."
"...is a great honor to the Persia people."

Chemical Ollie · November 14, 2002, 08:18

Lincoln when treatened: "You're all hat and no cattle".

Anybody know what that means?

Chemical Ollie · November 14, 2002, 08:21

Remember the Council in CIV2?

When the Elvis look- alike tells you: "The people rejoy Sire! All hail to your Majesty -The King!"

Chemical Ollie · November 14, 2002, 08:26

Miccofl, I thought the bad language filter of Apolyton cut worlds like b*tch out? But perhaps not from screenshots? Let's put the filter to test: ****ing *****

Chemical Ollie · November 14, 2002, 08:29

Quote:

Originally posted by Olaf Hårfagre
Miccofl, I thought the bad language filter of Apolyton cut worlds like b*tch out? But perhaps not from screenshots? Let's put the filter to test: ****ing *****

The filter did it's job allright! I wonder why words that are in the game are not allowed in forums discussing the game? Or did you personally modify the text in your own game, miccofl?

Catt · November 14, 2002, 11:14

Quote:

Originally posted by Olaf Hårfagre
Lincoln when treatened: "You're all hat and no cattle".

Anybody know what that means?

American idiom, usually associated with Texas or cattle ranching country in general during America's growth westward in the "wild west" or "cowboy" days. The phrase itself refers to a "fake rancher" -- imagine a "cowboy" with a big, ten gallon hat, large belt buckle, cowboy boots, etc. . . . basically all the trappings of the stereotypical cowboy / rancher, but without a ranch or cattle!

It might be replaced today as "you talk the talk but can't walk the walk" or more simply "you're all bluff and bluster and I don't fear you."

Catt

Chemical Ollie · November 14, 2002, 13:37

Quote:

Originally posted by Catt

American idiom, usually associated with Texas or cattle ranching country in general during America's growth westward...

Well, I thought it meant something like that.

Isn't it ironic that the civil war Union president uses slang invented in a Rebel state?

Chemical Ollie · November 14, 2002, 13:41

How about the Shogun: "Go boil your head!"

He probably means that literally...

mrmitchell · November 14, 2002, 18:55

Quote:

Originally posted by Olaf Hårfagre
Miccofl, I thought the bad language filter of Apolyton cut worlds like b*tch out? But perhaps not from screenshots? Let's put the filter to test: ****ing *****

So are you saying we can post cusswords in screenshots if we want to say them?

LMAO, or we can say them in acronym (LMAO) or in a secret code, like hilar could mean (enter cuss here)

Truly, we are sophisticated citizens and need not soil our tongues with the curse of bad, rude, and disruptive language.

miccofl · November 14, 2002, 19:11

mrmitchell the swear filter that webmasters employ cannot detect pixels in jpg and gif. And yes, the text file had been altered but I never really expected that result...

SultanofATL · November 14, 2002, 19:24

I get this from the Arabs: "We require (blank) but do not have anything worthy to offer you in trade, so I offer you prayers of peace. If you do not agree I can guarantee no peace."

aaglo · November 15, 2002, 05:29

B!TCH = female dog...

Chemical Ollie · November 16, 2002, 19:17

*BUMP*

I really like this subject but have nothing new to contribute at the moment. However, I do not want the tread to disappear into the historic archives yet. Anyone else have something to contribute?

Carver · November 16, 2002, 19:29

I proposed a very reasonable peace offer after pounding Isabella for a while

, and I get: "You will not beguile me like some flirty wench".

badams52 · November 17, 2002, 14:20

Honestly, it's great to hear all the quotes you've found. Personally, I'm too busy trying to play to read what the AIs are saying to me.

miccofl · November 17, 2002, 18:55

Carefull badams52, that could come back to bite you on the ass.

Naiveplayer · November 18, 2002, 00:49

One of the most hillarous quotes I saw was not in diplomacy, but was in the "Dan Quayle" screen:

I had lost a diplomatic victory and the rest of the leaders were taunting me. It was chieftain level in a mod. Joan was saying, "Go back to chieftain" and like duh! I am in chieftain

Chemical Ollie · November 18, 2002, 05:17

Quote:

Originally posted by Naiveplayer
... Go back to chieftain" and like duh! I am in chieftain

Perhaps she meant settler?

Mad Bomber · November 18, 2002, 07:16

This is probably the funniest I have seen in Civ 3. I had whipped Hammi in war, so now I had figured that I would extort a little tribute, namely 4 of the 5 cities he possessed.

His response:

"Unacceptable, Unacceptable, unacceptable! Oooo- You make me so mad!"

Needless to say Hammi still gave me the cities, but I gave him the rope, AI's never learn

aaglo · November 18, 2002, 08:59

I would say, that overall the best quotes come from furious AI leaders. They are all so hilarious.

alva · November 18, 2002, 09:05

Quote:

Originally posted by mrmitchell

So are you saying we can post cusswords in screenshots if we want to say them?

LMAO, or we can say them in acronym (LMAO) or in a secret code, like hilar could mean (enter cuss here)

If I'm not mistaken, one of the most frequent used swair words allready is an acronym

(yeah,yeah, the 4 letter one

)

wilbill · November 19, 2002, 01:29

Upon completion of a trade deal with the English, "I, Elizabeth, ruler of way too many places to mention, thank my good friend, Hannibal."

Flight · November 19, 2002, 08:46

im just ****ing testing. thanks

aaglo · November 19, 2002, 09:39

Flight - your grammar is bad. Go back to school. NOW!

Chemical Ollie · November 19, 2002, 11:55

Mao, after I refused his false blackmail:

"But of course! We were just kidding! Haha! Funny joke, eh?"

Flight, there must be something wrong with the filter. When I write ****ing, it doesn't pass.

Flight · November 19, 2002, 14:33

does when i do it

sorry aaglo

mrmitchell · November 19, 2002, 18:29

Okay, the cuss conversation is dead now. Back to hilarious AI quotes.

Carthage: (upon entering their territory) "I was not aware that Spain employed blind men, drunkards, and children as generals."

And, I think this has been posted before, but:
"Three words: increase your medication..."
(Also, on the conquest victory, hilarious: "Two words: wait til next time!")

Naiveplayer · November 20, 2002, 00:29

I've seen that "Three words: increase your medication" in the diplomacy.txt but never saw it. I imagine that it would be funny.

I got this "A plate of hero cookies for you!" when I beat the game diplomatically. I thought that was funny until every leader started to say this, and "Esteemed colluge, I congraulate you on your victory!"

lateralis · November 20, 2002, 03:20

when you decide to try and get in the good graces of a furious neighbor you've beaten into submission and give them a gift of ANYTHING, I've gotten this:

"feeling guilty are we? well thanks... i guesss"

lateralis

Rufus T. Firefly · November 20, 2002, 03:40

Quote:

Originally posted by wilbill
Upon completion of a trade deal with the English, "I, Elizabeth, ruler of way too many places to mention, thank my good friend, Hannibal."

The last time I got this, it was one turn before the French sacked the last English city and took them out of the game. "Way too many places"? Riiiiight.