I think I've figured out why classical music is so boring

Buck Birdseed · February 19, 2003, 19:40

'Cause like, you've got all these bands, right, and they're all doing f*cking covers all the time. And they're not, like, interesting covers either, you don't get Reggae versions of Tchaikovsky's paino concerto No. 1 or anything, it's all the same mixing, the same instrumentation, the same arrangements even. How do they ever expect to gain respect from real musicians if they're all a bunch of Tribute Bands?

Plus you can't dance to it properly.

Six Thousand Year Old Man · February 19, 2003, 19:43

I thought it was because they were always sitting down, and hiding being sheets of music. Zero charisma.

Now, if the lead violinist windmilled his/her bow prior to a solo, and then set fire to the violin on the stage... then we'd have something.

Asher · February 19, 2003, 19:44

It's boring because there's no vocals.
Opera is boring because there's no coherent vocals.

It always comes off as pompous and rigid too.

Skanky Burns · February 19, 2003, 19:46

Boris arriving in 3,2,1...

monolith94 · February 19, 2003, 19:46

Oh lord... not this again...

Dis · February 19, 2003, 19:46

I don't think vocals are it. I like instrumentals in heavy metal and such.

I also like classical music. Well some of it. I like the heavier stuff. It's difficult to describe heavy classical music, But you know it when you hear it. I do like some light instruments though. It's all a matter of timing. But usually I like the thunderous stuff.

Skanky Burns · February 19, 2003, 19:49

I like "In The Hall of the Mountain King", for instance. But then again, that doesn't follow Snap's rules. There is a techno cover of it.
Ditto "Fur Elise"

KrazyHorse · February 19, 2003, 19:49

You find classical music boring because you've had your brain twisted by overstated music.

Next question.

Al B. Sure! · February 19, 2003, 19:53

i got a question...

what was the music of the common people in the 18th century like? was it less boring?

It seems that when the music of the common people (instead of that of the rich) become marketed (at the turn of the century but especially with the emergence of jazz) music became a lot more active and more expressive.

thanks

Wraith · February 19, 2003, 19:58

--"And they're not, like, interesting covers either,"

Look for a song called "Watashi no tamagoyaki" (which means "My Omelette"). Best classical cover ever.

And try to watch the video if you get a chance (it's the closing credits for Dragon Half).

Wraith
"I, Damaramu, will regret this."
-- Damaramu ("Dragon Half")

Buck Birdseed · February 19, 2003, 20:07

(btw, I'm keeping a "got the joke/didn't get the joke" tally of the people in this thread. Keep the responses coming.)

Albert: There's certainly some interesting popular music of the 18th century, but certainly the 20th century has produced a considerably bigger share. I think it has to do with mass urbanisation and the intermingling of cultures especially in the US-jolly peasants don't make good, low-down dirty decadent music.

In Sweden we have a musical form originally from the 17th century called the visa. It displays many of the key characteristics of modern pop music- extreme adaptability while maintaining distinct identity, urban, personally introspective and played by just one man with his guitar. There are practicioners from the 18th century whose songs are still very much alive today. For example, there's C. M. Bellman, Sweden's immensely popular national poet, who borrowed tunes from the classical music of the time and wrote brilliant angsty, decadent songs about drinking and death. The style has since constantly adapted and still forms the backbone for most interesting swedish rock and pop of recent years.

Asher · February 19, 2003, 20:08

Quote:

(btw, I'm keeping a "got the joke/didn't get the joke" tally of the people in this thread. Keep the responses coming.)

Does this include the people who classify any music threads with you in them as a joke?

Boris Godunov · February 19, 2003, 20:11

Quote:

Originally posted by Skanky Burns
Boris arriving in 3,2,1...

No, I got the joke.

Buck Birdseed · February 19, 2003, 20:12

Lemme put it this way: There's one person on the "got the joke" list so far, and it ain't you.

Buck Birdseed · February 19, 2003, 20:13

****, sorry Boris, x-post.

Skanky Burns · February 19, 2003, 20:13

It was a thread with "classical music" in the title - I knew you couldn't resist, regardless.

Asher · February 19, 2003, 20:14

Quote:

Originally posted by Buck Birdseed
Lemme put it this way: There's one person on the "got the joke" list so far, and it ain't you.

That's probably because people didn't read your post, just the subject. Everyone but one person apparently knew better.

Boris Godunov · February 19, 2003, 20:21

Quote:

Originally posted by Six Thousand Year Old Man
I thought it was because they were always sitting down, and hiding being sheets of music. Zero charisma.

Now, if the lead violinist windmilled his/her bow prior to a solo, and then set fire to the violin on the stage... then we'd have something.

You should see the fireworks divas do in opera to get attention.

Donizetti made the horrendous mistake in his opera Maria Stuarta of having two soprano parts (Queen Liz I and Mary Stuart) of equal size performed by divas of equal egos. Then he compounded the error of giving them an actual scene where they were on stage...at the same time.

The first two divas to partake these roles broke into a scuffle and were rolling around on the stage, tearing at each other's hair. Now that would have been a spectacle.

The problem isn't the music, it's the audiences. Classical audiences are far too staid and polite, especially in the U.S. In the old days, audiences weren't afraid to voice their pleasure/displeasure in the rowdiest of ways. Rossini had to flee the opera house in fear of his life after the disasterous premiere of The Barber of Seville. Stravinksy's The Right of Spring sparked a fist-fight that turned into a street riot in 1913 in Paris. In certain parts of Italy, opera singers have had to dodge gun fire from the stalls.

And you think that'd be boring? Cha!

Dis · February 19, 2003, 20:30

did they have the east coast/ west coast classical fued

Al B. Sure! · February 19, 2003, 20:31

Boris:

That reminds me of Shakespeare... today, people think Shakespeare is boring and all that but back in the 16th century, a shakespeare play on stage was like a circus... the audience shouting things out and acting rowdy and the actors hyping them up

thanks

Az · February 19, 2003, 20:32

Snapcase:

Quote:

(btw, I'm keeping a "got the joke/didn't get the joke" tally of the people in this thread. Keep the responses coming.)

Boris:

Quote:

No, I got the joke.

Snapcase:

Quote:

Lemme put it this way: There's one person on the "got the joke" list so far, and it ain't you.

Best X-post EVER!

Wraith · February 19, 2003, 20:33

--"Lemme put it this way: There's one person on the "got the joke" list so far, and it ain't you."

I should have included a visual.

Wraith
"Aaah! They cut out all my scenes!"
-- Dug Finn ("Dragon Half")

Boris Godunov · February 19, 2003, 20:38

Quote:

Originally posted by Dissident
did they have the east coast/ west coast classical fued

There were tons of feuds among classical composers, schools of musical thought, and of course between performers, particularly opera singers.

There was of course the celebrated Mozart-Salieri rivalry. But that was largely fictional.

Then there was Brahms vs. Wagner. Well, more like Wagner vs. Brahms while Brahms scratched his head and wondered why he was being so badly treated, since he had openly expressed admiration for Wagner's music in many instances.

Hmm, can't recall any hits or contractual murders in any of them, although divas have paid people to boo their rivals in opera performances. That happened as recently as the 1960s (and probably still does today), with a notorious incident at La Scala when Mirella Freni debuted in La traviata (she was 17 at the time).

Six Thousand Year Old Man · February 19, 2003, 20:49

Quote:

Originally posted by Buck Birdseed
Lemme put it this way: There's one person on the "got the joke" list so far, and it ain't you.

Me, me!

Zylka · February 19, 2003, 22:07

Well, like, your wonderful little inside "joke" wasn't at all obtuse and worthless

Gold star for originality, retard

St Leo · February 19, 2003, 22:55

U r all gray twits. Klazzikal Muzak r0x0rs my b0x0rs.

Boris Godunov · February 19, 2003, 23:24

Quote:

Originally posted by Asher
Opera is boring because there's no coherent vocals.

And hey...isn't this like saying Foreign Films are boring because you don't speak the language?

St Leo · February 19, 2003, 23:30

Opera is boring because there's no coherent vocals.

Strangely enough, my two genres of choice are Classical and Metal. In both, the vocals are rarely coherent (compared to, say, those in Yellow Submarine). I guess I am just not a vocals kind of guy.

KrazyHorse · February 20, 2003, 08:45

Snappie, everybody here got the joke. Well, most of them, anyways.

It's not like you've ever started this topic before....

Urban Ranger · February 20, 2003, 12:09

I think your handle sounds better if you change it to "Buck Birdfeed."