May 13, 2003, 17:33
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#1
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Deity
Local Time: 02:22
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Location: Germans own my soul.
Posts: 14,861
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A question - why are vampires always clean-shaven?
You know, I've watched all these vampire films and they are always marvellously well shaven...but how do they shave effectively when they cannot see their own reflection? Just something to think about there 
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May 13, 2003, 17:37
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#2
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Local Time: 12:22
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Location: Skanky Father
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They are dead so they don't grow more hair. 
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I'm building a wagon! On some other part of the internets, obviously (but not that other site).
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May 13, 2003, 17:38
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#3
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Deity
Local Time: 02:22
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Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: Germans own my soul.
Posts: 14,861
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Skanky Burns
They are dead so they don't grow more hair.
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That is a rather broad and sweeping assumption. Do you have any evidence to back up the fact they wouldn't grow facial hair?
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May 13, 2003, 17:40
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#4
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Deity
Local Time: 18:22
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So they don't get scabs in their beards.
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Christianity is the belief in a cosmic Jewish zombie who can give us eternal life if we symbolically eat his flesh and blood and telepathically tell him that we accept him as our lord and master so he can remove an evil force present in all humanity because a woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from an apple tree.
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May 13, 2003, 17:43
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#5
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Local Time: 12:22
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100% of vampires that I have met didn't grow any facial hair. Ever.
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I'm building a wagon! On some other part of the internets, obviously (but not that other site).
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May 13, 2003, 17:47
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#6
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Emperor
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Fingernails and hair actually grow for a little while after you're dead. Your intestines still function, too, so dead people can defecate.
And vampires are seen as sexy in our culture. Scraggily and hairy isn't usually sexy.
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May 13, 2003, 17:54
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#7
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Emperor
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Wait. Count Blackula has a mustache.
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Tutto nel mondo č burla
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May 13, 2003, 17:57
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#8
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Emperor
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Oh, and Dracula had facial hair in the Gary Oldman film of a few years ago, when he was in London.
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Tutto nel mondo č burla
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May 13, 2003, 17:58
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#9
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Emperor
Local Time: 03:22
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Location: Kokonino Kounty
Posts: 4,263
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Skanky Burns
They are dead so they don't grow more hair.
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Vampires are NOT dead.
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Within weeks they'll be re-opening the shipyards
And notifying the next of kin
Once again...
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May 13, 2003, 18:05
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#10
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Warlord
Local Time: 01:22
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Posts: 189
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Hueij
Vampires are NOT dead.
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No, UNdead, big difference. About the hair, waxing.
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May 13, 2003, 18:06
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#11
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Local Time: 20:22
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Because the growth process stops when you become a vampire, that is why, in "Interview w/a Vampire" the little girl stayed a little girl and why vampires don't grow beards.
ACK!
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May 13, 2003, 18:06
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#12
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Emperor
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I think Count Numbula and Chocula have at least pencil mustaches as well, so, once again, Provost is full of it.
And if I recall, "The Lost Boys" was full of hairy vampires.
Ha ha, you suck.
__________________
Life and death is a grave matter;
all things pass quickly away.
Each of you must be completely alert;
never neglectful, never indulgent.
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May 13, 2003, 18:08
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#13
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Deity
Local Time: 18:22
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Quote:
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Originally posted by Boris Godunov
Wait. Count Blackula has a mustache.
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He also had one of the most atrocious afros I have ever seen.
__________________
Christianity is the belief in a cosmic Jewish zombie who can give us eternal life if we symbolically eat his flesh and blood and telepathically tell him that we accept him as our lord and master so he can remove an evil force present in all humanity because a woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from an apple tree.
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May 13, 2003, 18:09
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#14
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Emperor
Local Time: 18:22
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You think so? I don't think it's too bad.
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Tutto nel mondo č burla
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May 13, 2003, 18:12
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#15
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Emperor
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Hair and nails do not grow after your death, it's just your skin kinda sniks, so more of the hair shows 'n' stuff.
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May 13, 2003, 18:15
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#16
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Deity
Local Time: 18:22
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I guess blackula wasn't as 'fro-y as I remembered. It's been a long time since I saw that trashy little waste of film.
__________________
Christianity is the belief in a cosmic Jewish zombie who can give us eternal life if we symbolically eat his flesh and blood and telepathically tell him that we accept him as our lord and master so he can remove an evil force present in all humanity because a woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from an apple tree.
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May 13, 2003, 18:17
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#17
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Emperor
Local Time: 17:22
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Join Date: Jun 2000
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Posts: 3,262
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__________________
Life and death is a grave matter;
all things pass quickly away.
Each of you must be completely alert;
never neglectful, never indulgent.
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May 13, 2003, 19:21
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#18
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Queen
Local Time: 21:22
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Posts: 5,848
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Check out Van Richten's Guide to Vampires, wherein he describes all the reasons why they can eat and defecate, but can't actually digest their food.
On an unrelated note, if Medusa had snakes for hair, didn't that make it difficult to spray deodorant on her armpits?
(And don't follow that train of logic any further down, either.)
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"lol internet" ~ AAHZ
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May 13, 2003, 20:07
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#19
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Emperor
Local Time: 19:22
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The actor who played Pee Wee Herman played a vamp. with plenty of facial hair in the Buffy movie.
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May 13, 2003, 21:43
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#20
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Warlord
Local Time: 18:22
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That's why Medusa stinks like sh1t.
But that doesn't matter anyway to people back then, since they never bathed and dumped all their sh1t onto the street.
(In 1855, Pennsylvania passed a law probihiting the bath.)
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May 13, 2003, 22:26
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#21
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Emperor
Local Time: 21:22
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Blacks just don't make good vampires, they're not pale enough.
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...we just argue without evidence, secure in our own superiority. - Snotty
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May 13, 2003, 22:28
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#22
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Emperor
Local Time: 01:22
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Blackula  loved it 
Didn't Dracula have facial hair in Brahm Stroker's Dracula?
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May 13, 2003, 22:30
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#23
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Emperor
Local Time: 01:22
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Location: Mu Mu Land
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He had a mustache... sorry about the Stroker thing, been talking to Wittlich too much 
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May 13, 2003, 23:07
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#24
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Emperor
Local Time: 21:22
Local Date: November 1, 2010
Join Date: Dec 1969
Location: USA
Posts: 3,197
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In the 19th century good guys generally had beards, sideburns, and or moustaches, while bad guys were often clean shaven. Maybe that's why.
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"I say shoot'em all and let God sort it out in the end!
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