One key aspect of doing any trading is your military power. Go to the Mil advisor and see what he says about your relative strength verses the Civ.
If it says you are weaker, you can expect to not get a good deal and in fact may soon face demands.
Understand, that you may have better units and could in fact defeat that civ, but that does not matter. It basically comes down to who has the most troops, even thought patches tried to take into account the unit power.
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