Balderdash PBEM - Page 13

GhengisFarb™ · January 31, 2004, 19:15

Sent to conmcb25.

What's up with GodKing? Did someone already take him out of the game or did he just "retire" from the game?

conmcb25 · January 31, 2004, 23:33

The Romans are proud to announce the construction of the worlds first vomitorium.

Also the French were encountered and sumarily destroyed. They dropped there weapons and ran of course.

Rhothaerill · February 1, 2004, 02:40

The German Empire wishes to reveal the truth to the world. My fellow worldly inhabitants what has come to my attention is perhaps the most shocking news ever released for general consumption. My friends, the nations of the Netherlands and Rome are ruled by MONKEYS! It is a sad day when shocking news like this has occured. But there is hope. My friends, we will survive this onslaught. We must endeavor to form an alliance to eradicate all of monkeydom from the face of our earth. I have in my hands the secret weapon. He will be our saving grace, our prime weapon against the madness of monkeydom. Through his appetite, we will survive, and we will thrive! His name...Bucky!

3650bc to Darekill

Darekill · February 1, 2004, 03:29

There is the slight possibility that the egyptian koreamns are not alone in this world...
It seems to be highly probabal that their leader is a halforc..
So. you realy think that the monkey at rome and the netherlands can shock me?

Oha, kaum wikl man in eine Hütte gehen, schon muß man zurück nach Hause....

Arnelos · February 1, 2004, 07:35

Quote:

Originally posted by GhengisFarb
What's up with GodKing? Did someone already take him out of the game or did he just "retire" from the game?

hi ,

i'm sorry, but the ministry of information is restricted from giving out classified information .............

if you need to know you about it, i'm sure an official announcement will be made at the time it is determined that you have a need to know

...................... , , ,

have a nice day

Arnelos · February 1, 2004, 07:37

Quote:

Originally posted by Arnelos
hi ,

i'm sorry, but the ministry of information is restricted from giving out classified information .............

if you need to know you about it, i'm sure an official announcement will be made at the time it is determined that you have a need to know

...................... , , ,

have a nice day

I'm terribly sorry about this. To assauge any concerns for the state of our bureaucracy, the receptionist at the Ministry of Information that provided you with that response has been sumarily executed.

May that news indeed give you a truly wonderful day.

conmcb25 · February 1, 2004, 09:00

Quote:

Originally posted by Rhothaerill
The German Empire wishes to reveal the truth to the world. My fellow worldly inhabitants what has come to my attention is perhaps the most shocking news ever released for general consumption. My friends, the nations of the Netherlands and Rome are ruled by MONKEYS! It is a sad day when shocking news like this has occured. But there is hope. My friends, we will survive this onslaught. We must endeavor to form an alliance to eradicate all of monkeydom from the face of our earth. I have in my hands the secret weapon. He will be our saving grace, our prime weapon against the madness of monkeydom. Through his appetite, we will survive, and we will thrive! His name...Bucky!

3650bc to Darekill

Ya and you sir, are a FAT GLUTTON! Needlessly eating your self into a stupor, wasting food and needlessly chopping down trees in an attempt to pollute the entire planet! (As well as your arteries!)

Monkeydom will pay you back for this!

GhengisFarb™ · February 1, 2004, 10:12

What's that, something like 12 posts and not one of you played the save and passed it on?

Beta · February 1, 2004, 10:30

Quote:

Originally posted by GhengisFarb
What's that, something like 12 posts and not one of you played the save and passed it on?

That's because you all suck and are lazy.

This nonsense ends right here!

Save sent to ZargonX.

And would you all please stop this senseless prattle. It is enough to make one sick. Sick to one's stomach, I say.

con - please send those architectural drawings for the vomitorium.

And Rhoth - what do you have against Monkeys? This Simian Comspiracy theory of yours is, well, BALDERDASH!

Arnelos · February 2, 2004, 00:51

Quote:

Originally posted by Beta
And would you all please stop this senseless prattle. It is enough to make one sick. Sick to one's stomach, I say.

Excellent! The senseless prattle weaponry is working!

ZargonX · February 2, 2004, 01:41

Quote:

con - please send those architectural drawings for the vomitorium.

If you get a vomitorium up and running, please let us know. The brothers could really use one after our late night "cram" sessions...

To Arn

Arnelos · February 2, 2004, 08:10

Been having trouble with my e-mail, so I've PMed GodKing at both here and at MZO to let him know that I'm posting the save in this thread. If someone else who has his e-mail addy wouldn't mind sending him an e-mail to let him know he can pick it up here, I'm sure that wouldn't hurt.

As for the turn:

------------------------------------------

Our Elite Regulation Enforcement Detachment encountered a group of barbarians claiming to be Koreans. Now, all Babylonian regulation enforcement detachments have standing orders to exterminate any Korean warriors they might encounter, but there are so many such standing orders, rules of engagement, and other regulations governing the commencement of hostilities that they while they were pouring through the several backpacks worth of their orders, they realized that the claims of the warriors they had encountered may not be quite accurate.

First of all, despite claiming to be Korean, they were clearly dressed in Egyptian clothing. Confused, the elite troopers of our regulation enforcement detachment turned to several other sections of their standing orders, rules of engagement, and other procedures for determining the identity of potential hostiles and determing the appopriate coarse of action designated for each.

It was while they were doing this that they overheard the Egyptians who claimed to be Korean speaking in what clearly sounded like German. Further confused, the regulatory officer on the field apparently said "screw the rulebook, let's just kill 'em!"

Now, given that the two groups of warriors were at some distance from one another, the method of killing decided upon in the heat of the moment was apparently missile weaponry, the most avanced of which available were rocks lying about around the trees.

The first volley was unfortunately quite unsuccessful, but did manage to alert the Koreans/Egyptians/Germans to the regulatory enforcement detachment's presence, upon which they picked up their own rocks and started throwing back.

Well, both sides of course found cover behind trees and boulders and made a practice of uselessly throwing small rocks at targets they did not have sufficient ability to hit.

This apparently wore on for a time until it dawned upon the commanding officer of the elite regulatory enforcement detachment that they knew these were probably Germans and could use this knowledge against them. This is when he peaked out, called out "Halo! Hans! Wie Geht's?", upon which one of the Koreans/Egyptians/Germans popped his head up from his hiding spot and was promptly nailed right between the eyes with a well aimed rock and killed.

The Babylonian regulatory enforcement troopers cheered and started using similar measures to call out names in German to get their opponents to drop their cover.

Given that the Koreans/Egyptians/Germans knew of no common names for Babylonians nor anything about the dead language of the Babylonians, they were mercilessly slaughtered.

Following this incident, the commander of the elite regulation enforcement detachment was brought up for Court Martial on the following charges:

1. Failing to adhere to regulations regarding first contact procedures and rules of engagement.

2. Obvious lack of leadership over a group of elite troops, who under a more capable commander would have killed many of the Koreans/Egyptians/Germans with the first suprise volley.

3. Showing ingenuity in action through the use of a clearly unauthorized and as yet unapproved tactic for regulation enforcement.

4. Use of a language other than Babylonian without the proper clearances and licenses from the Ministry of Language Administration.

5. Failing to enforce proper discipline of troops under his command when they cheered, an action which took place outside of the stipulated proceures for combat action given the specific particulars under which the regulation enforcement detachment found itself.

For these charges, the commanding officer was found justly guilty and executed in hopes of providing an example to other regulation enforcment officers about the importance of following proper procedure.

The Ministry of Foreign Affairs apologizes to whichever parties of Koreans, Egyptians, or Germans it may concern that their warriors were not killed with the correct manner of ruthless efficiency and adherance to guidelines that is called for under Babylonian Law. We promise that our forces will properly slaughter Koreans/Egyptians/Germans more properly in the future.

Save to GodKing.

GodKing · February 5, 2004, 15:15

Just got it. Probably will not be able to play for a day or two - going out of town for work.

GhengisFarb™ · February 5, 2004, 16:14

Ah another of Arnie's posts!

/me pulls out the ruler.......

GhengisFarb™ · February 6, 2004, 21:09

SKIP conmcb25"S TURN!!!!!!!!!

He's apparently going to be gone for the next 45 days to some Naval convention.

Rasputin · February 6, 2004, 22:31

Naval or Navel ????

GhengisFarb™ · February 6, 2004, 22:51

I don't know. He said something in another thread about "not needing rubbers cuz there was a whole boatload of men" or something to that effect.

Beta · February 7, 2004, 23:05

Arnelos - I praise your great nation. Policies and procedures and adherence to same are the foundation to greatness. With such discipline, your little pissant nation wil make it to adolescence before it is chewed up and spit out by a lawless and warlike nation. I just want you to know, that lawless and warlike nation will NOT be the Dutch.

Live long and prosper.

conmcb25 · February 8, 2004, 08:34

GodKing is at the Naval Convention.

Im exploring Navels this weekend.

Just so we have that straight.

Arnelos · February 9, 2004, 10:49

:yawn:

So when is GodKing going to be available to play it again?

GhengisFarb™ · February 9, 2004, 11:20

What? Arnelos isn't the one we are waiting on?

/me dies of a heart attack.

Arnelos · February 9, 2004, 14:35

Quote:

Originally posted by GhengisFarb
What? Arnelos isn't the one we are waiting on?

* GhengisFarb dies of a heart attack.

I haven't been the one you've been waiting on in quite some time, actually. You're just not very good at paying attention...

GhengisFarb™ · February 9, 2004, 14:47

Quote:

Originally posted by Arnelos
You're just not very good at paying attention...

What's your point.........

GhengisFarb™ · February 9, 2004, 20:10

Sent to conmcb25.

Blah blah blah you're all gonna die......

conmcb25 · February 10, 2004, 13:22

I do not know when I will be ble to play. I have been spending WAAAAAAAAAAAY to much time eating then vomiting then eating again.

That vomitorium comes in handy.

I will be willing to sell the Vomiting Tech to anyone for 10 gold.

If I can ever stop eating and vomiting of course.

Consel Nixon is especially fond of the vomitorium, especially after he gets done talking to liberals.

Rhothaerill · February 10, 2004, 22:11

I didn't know Monkey's were intelligent enough to be able to purposely vomit after eating. Or maybe that's just stupidity?

Bucky Cat the Monkey Hunter will find out soon enough!!!

3600bc to Darekill.

Darekill · February 11, 2004, 02:27

After defeating that anoyance from Babylon which included the destruction of Babylon itself the german korean egyptians continue their way to domination...

Save send to Ghengis Farb....

Nö, ich habe heute keine Lust was auf deutsch zu schreiben. Weint doch....

Beta · February 11, 2004, 08:34

To ZargonX.

Rhoth - I will fire up the tuna trap. Satchel and I will be waiting.

Arnelos · February 12, 2004, 13:56

To GodKing

As for my situation...

Why do I bother?

......................

Our vicious volcanoes and jungle diseases will defend us from the infidels!!! You will all die horrible deaths at the hands of mighty jungle warriors of Babylon!!!

GhengisFarb™ · February 12, 2004, 14:00

Someone had wittle too much coffee this morning.